


Sunshine Rapper

by Ravenclaw20



Category: 3racha - Fandom, Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fanboy Lee Felix, Fluff, Gay Male Character, M/M, Slow Build, Underground Rapper Seo Changbin, changlix, eventually a bunch of hugging, mlm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-05-26 15:18:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 25,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15003686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravenclaw20/pseuds/Ravenclaw20
Summary: Felix is new to Korea, new to JYP high, and is only interested in three things; music, dancing and the dark haired boy nobody talks to.





	1. How They Met

JYP highschool, shitty name, but brilliant school. Pristine hallways, lush lawns, programmes for every subject and Felix’s new high school. When his parents told him they were sending him to live in Korea with his cousin and her family, he dreaded the idea, but when they told him he could also pursue music, the idea didn’t seem as bad anymore. So far the tour his cousin was giving consisted of courtyards, people, more courtyards and more people. All he wanted was the music and dance department but something, rather someone, drew his focus away from yet another courtyard.

“Who’s that?” Felix asked, nodding towards a small hooded figure. His cousin Jimin had introduced him to every person they came across, yet when she followed Felix’s gaze she immediately shook her head.

“Oh,” she smiled hesitantly, “he’s not someone you want to know about. So anyway this is the East cour-”

“Why wouldn’t I want to know him?” Felix cut her off, gaze drawn to the dark haired boy. Felix felt the urge to go talk to him. Find out what he was writing in that tiny book.

Seeing that her younger cousin wouldn’t give up, Jimin moved to stand in front of him. She knew Felix liked to make friends in the oddest of places, but this time, she can’t accept this one. Firmly, she grips his shoulders, bringing his focus back to her.

“Felix, I’m serious,” she started in a low voice, “he’s part of gang and used to get into fights all the time at his old school before coming here. Promise me you’ll stay away from him.”

Even though he was curious, Felix could see Jimin was truly panicked thinking about him being friends with this kid. Instead of arguing, he simply nods, allowing her to pull him away from the courtyard where the dark haired boy stays alone.

I’ll just have to make sure Jimin doesn’t know. He thinks, gazing at the boy once more before he’s out of sight.

__________

People were staring at him again. Changbin wondered what new rumour was floating around today. Was it that he had killed another mafia boss? Or that he and his ‘gang’ had raided another convenient store, threatening the owner so they got their purchase for free. He scoffed.

_People really have nothing better to do._

Even though he hated the stares he got, he learnt to live with them. At least at this school people were too scared to actually talk to him. Anything they said they never said to his face, and even though it was cowardly, he preferred not having to fight people.

As he entered the pristine white hallways, he watched as his uniformed peers scrambled out of his way, pointing and whispering as they always did. He was in no mood for anyone’s shit today, he had a 5 hour shift as soon as school was over and three separate music projects to work on.

When he got to his locker, he was surprised to see everyone scramble, except one person. The tall blonde haired boy stayed in place, laughing and oblivious to Changbins presence. The friends he was with sent Changbin varied looks of fear, trying to convey something to the blonde, but either he was oblivious or he didn’t care.

Changbin cleared his throat, but the blonde just continued his story as if he didn’t hear him.

 _‘Is he ignoring me?’_ Changbin thought. He should have been annoyed, but he found himself more curious than anything. Clearing his throat again he stepped closer, tapping the taller boy on his shoulder.

“Uh, you’re on my locker.” Changbin felt his breath catch when the boy turned and faced him. His hair was lighter in the front that in the back, almost platinum. He had warm honey brown eyes, and a constellation of freckles smattered across his nose bridge and cheeks. His cross earing glinted in the sunlight, giving the boy the illusion of glowing. Changbin was floored. He looked like sunshine personified and he concluded one thing. This kid was hot.

_‘Was not expecting that.’_

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Felix said shyly, moving away from the locker. He watched in awe as the dark haired boy opened his locker, ignoring his classmates pulling at his arm. Now he had a good look at the boy, he was even more determined to get to know him.

He noted that the boy had brown highlights complimenting his chocolate eyes, and three small studs, two in one ear and one in the other. He could also see the faint marks of a tattoo when the boy raised his arm to retrieve his books.

By now his friends were on the other side of the hallway, trying to call him over, but Felix couldn’t move. He didn’t want to.

Clearing his throat, he stuck his hand out, “I don’t think we’ve met before, I’m Felix.”

Changbin was beyond shocked when the sunshine boy stuck his hand out and introduced himself. His voice did not match his face, rich and deep. Like honey. ‘Felix’, he thought staring at the boy. Nobody had ever introduced themselves to him at this school, but as he turned and faced Felix he could feel he would befriend this kid.

Changbin heard the whole hallway go quiet as everyone waited to see what he would do. Felix still had his hand out, a bright smile pasted on his lips, waiting on Changbin to respond. He could either walk away from the kid, or he could introduce himself.

As he mulled over what to do, Felix leaned closer. “This is where you shake my hand and tell me your name,” he whispered, his smile turning cheeky. Changbin was surprised, nobody ever engaged with him, let alone joked with him, but he couldn’t help the smirk that came to his lips.

Grabbing Felix’s, smaller he noted, hands he shook it once. “I’m Changbin.”

The entire hallway burst into whispers at that. Felix however, was elated. He tuned out the whispering in the hallways, happy to know the name of the boy who caught his interest. Even though he promised Jimin he wouldn’t, there was something that drew him in about Changbin and now that he was talking to him Felix would get as far as he could to befriend him.

Looking down at the books in his hands Felix was surprised to see ‘The Art of Rapping Vol. 1′, amongst them. He tilted his head, before a bright smile crossed his lips.

“Do you rap?” Felix asked letting go of Changbin’s arm. He wasn’t much of a rapper himself, but even back in Australia, he was interested in the underground rap scene Korea had. His favorite group was one called 3racha. He knew they had three members, obviously, but other than their stage names nobody knew who they were or what they looked like. If they ever performed, they wore masks, hats and dark hoodies. The latest reveal Felix heard, was that the member CB97 was an Aussie as well.

“Oh,” Changbin started, still shocked that Felix was initiated a conversation, “k-kind of, it’s for my paper for my music class.”

“You’re in music?” Felix questioned, this time even more excited, “what year?”

Felix was in the music department, and hearing that Changbin was too made him happy. Now he could truly be friends with him, he planned to anyways, but if they were in the same department, finding him just became infinitely easier. He might even have classes with him, and since they both seemed free right now, it was possible they had the same lunch time.

“Uh, I’m a senior.” Changbin watched as Felix smiled impossibly brighter. ‘How is that even possible’, he wonders, watching as Felix seemingly glows at the revelation. Shaking his head, he starts to walk away from the boy, hoping to end the conversation there, but Felix simply follows him.

“I’m a junior!” Felix exclaimed, not believing his luck. The beautiful dark haired boy, was his senior, in the same department and liked music. Mulling over the fact that the shorter man was older than him, Felix thought of something.

“Hey,” he started, “ does this mean I can call you hyung now?”

Changbin stopped, absolutely floored at that. Facing the blonde,Changbin looks up at him to see if he’s joking. Surprisingly, Felix seems one hundred percent serious, even with the bright smile on his face.

“So can I?” He asks once more, waiting for Changbin to answer.

Changbin doesn’t know what to do. It wouldn’t be the first time he’s called hyung, but definitely, the first time someone in this school did. In fact Felix was knocking off a lot of firsts here. He is the first person the introduce themselves to Changbin. The first to speak to him without fear. And now…

“Ok,” Changbin replies, watching as the boy lets out a small ‘yes!’. Changbin hides a smile, before he clears his throat interrupting Felix’s mini happy dance. “I have to get to class now, but uh- see you around?”

Seriously Changbin, see you around??

Felix doesn’t seem to mind though, waving him off. “See you later Changbin hyung!” he exclaims, before turning and walking back to his classmates. Even though, everyone is freaking out around him, Felix is proud of himself that he became friends with Changbin. _‘My hyung..’_ he thinks with an elated smile.

Changbin himself is fighting the blush that spread across his cheeks at Felix’s exclamation. Walking quickly to his next class, he thinks over what just happened.

 _‘Changbin-hyung’_ he thinks with a small smile. This school year was going to be very interesting.


	2. A fan of who?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changbin finds out something about Felix and Jimin grows suspicious for other reasons.

Felix really hoped he could escape her. At least until the end of the day. What he didn’t expect was for Jimin to skip her fourth period lecture and come into the junior wing screaming his name. 

“FELIX LEE!” His cousins voice rang through the classroom bringing on a blanket of tense silence.

Felix squirmed, eyes shut as the door to his classroom swung open and smashed against the wall. Luckily for her the teacher hadn’t arrived yet. Unluckily for him that gave Jimin enough time to storm towards him and pull him from his seat. As she walked up and grabbed him by the ear, he sent a silent prayer that she didn't kill him right then and there. She was red in the face from her power march, and by the tick in her jaw Felix knew he was in deep shit. 

 

“Outside, right now.” Her teeth were clenched as she dragged him behind her. His classmates looking on without interrupting in fear of her wrath. 

 

Once far enough from the classrooms, Jimin released him, pacing back and forth on the cobbled pathway. She had brought him to one of the many courtyards she showed him before. This one had a fountain instead of benches, and was surrounded by open empty hallways. If she wanted to kill him, Felix was sure nobody would see. 

 

“The one person, Felix,” she started. “He was the one person I told you to stay away from!”

 

Felix had been on this side of Jimins wrath many times when they were kids, but this was very different from when he used to break the heads off her dolls. This anger was stemmed from worry. He watched her pace, fists clenched by her sides. He knew this time he wouldn't get away with a simple I'm sorry. But the more he thought about it the more he realized he wasn't. 

 

“I’m not sorry.” He stood his ground, and even though he was scared he wouldn’t let this go. He should be able to make friends as he pleases and Jimin should accept that.

 

“What?” Jimin puffed, pacing towards him slowly.

 

“I said I’m not sorry about it.” She stops in front of him, her eyes fierce with anger and a twinge of worry. Loose strands framed her face from where they fell out of her ponytail and her cheeks held the faint remnants of pink giving away her anger. If her eyes didn't hold the promise of a long argument, Felix would have thought she simply went for a run. 

She let out a heated puff. “And why not?” She just couldn’t understand why her cousin couldn’t listen to her. She had introduced him to enough people, and yet he wanted to be friends with the likes of social death.

 

Felix shrugged. He also didn’t know what his fascination with Changbin was. “Something about him seems okay to me.”

 

That was as close to the truth of his feelings as words could get. Sure it was his first day here, but something about the older boy drew him in. He felt it this morning when he saw him alone in the East courtyard, and again in the hallways. He knew he wanted to be Changbins friend. Or maybe even more. 

 

“He’s in a _gang_ Felix,” Jimin stressed. It wasn’t that she wanted her cousin to be unhappy, she just wanted him safe. She had heard of the brutal fights that went down at his old school and how his hoodlum friends would step in, sometimes using weapons. She shuddered picturing Felix as part of that.

 

“Lix,” she started calling him by his childhood pet name, “I just want you to be safe okay?”

 

Even though he was taller than her, she leaned up grasping him by his cheeks to make him look at her. He was and always would be her little cousin, more like a little brother, and she would do anything to protect him.

 

“I know,” Felix sighed, “but I don’t think he or his friends would hurt me. He doesn’t seem like that type of person”

 

Jimin released him, a disheartened look on her face. She knew Felix was naive at times and extremely innocent when it came to making new friends. This was a prime example.

 

“Fine,” she muttered, defeated, “But-” she met his gaze, “if you want to hang out with him I have to be there.”

 

Felix went to protest. “Jimi-”

 

“No excuses Felix, you don’t know him.”

 

“Neither do you!” She had her own friends why couldn’t she just let him be.

 

“Then we’ll learn about him together deal?” Jimin held her pinky out. Gingerly, Felix wrapped his pinky around hers, before the pair proceeded to slap their hands together twice and then press thumbs.

 

“Deal.”

 

______________________________

 

The next couple of weeks Changbin hoped were just extended fever dreams. Felix had made other friends since their introduction in the hallway; a taller boy name Hyunjin and another, a year younger, named Jeongin. Changbin took it as a sign that Felix would leave him be, hang out with people his own age. But he was sadly mistaken. The very next morning after they met, and every morning since, the freckled boy would find him in the East courtyard and stay with him until school started. Even more surprising was the girl who tagged along.  

 

“I’m Jimin.” She said on the first day. No offered hand, just a statement, before she took a seat next to her cousin. She then proceeded to ignore whatever minor inputs Changbin gave to Felix’s extensive rambling. 

 

Sometime during the passing weeks, Felix stopped sitting across from Changbin opting to sit next to him. Changbin didn't know what sparked the change, but he found he enjoyed it. 

 

Today when he found his spot in the East courtyard, he found himself waiting for them, almost too impatiently for them to show up.

 

“Hyung!” The smooth, deep voice  he had grown to like, called to him from behind. He pulled out an earbud just in time for Felix to come bounding up to his side. He was beaming and Changbin didn't fight the smile that spread across his face at the sight. “Morning!”

 

“Morning.” Changbin could feel himself getting lighter just with Felix’s presence. Over the passing weeks, he grew fond of the boy and as much as he didn’t admit it, he loved having him around. For the first time he was excited to go to school in the mornings, and was just as eager to see Felix coming up to him during lunch.

 

Felix never seemed to run out of things to talk about, whether it was music, tv shows or games. Changbin was endlessly entertained and his days at JYP High became worth staying for. 

 

As the pair took a seat he exchanged nods with Jimin. She still didn’t talk to him, ignoring him in the hallways when she was with her friends, but she would acknowledge his presence in the mornings. Whether it was acceptance or good manners, Changbin didn’t know; though he was positive it was the latter.

 

Jimin on the other hand was starting to grow suspicious. Not of Changbin, so far he hadn't given her any reason to believe he was more than an introvert, who may or may not deal with illegal activities after school. She was suspicious of Felix. In the past few weeks she noticed how excited he was in the bus on their way to school. How he smiled brightly whenever Changbin was in sight. How he stared at him longingly when they parted. Something was up there and she would figure it out.

 

“Hyung, look at this,” Felix said, sliding onto the bench next to Changbin. As he pulled up a picture on his phone, Changbin felt his heart skip. Felix smelt like strawberries today. Maybe it was a new shampoo or just that he had never been this close before but Changbin had to hold himself back from taking a deep breath. As the boy leaned closer pointing and smiling, Changbin felt a gentle grin return to his face. Felix had re-dyed his hair making it even icier blonde almost white, and his freckles moved as he spoke. 

 

He couldn't help it. Without realizing what he was doing, Changbin's hand found itself in Felix's platinum locks. He was fascinated by not only the colour, but how soft it was. Felix had stopped talking the second Changbin touched him, and Jimin watched the whole thing from beneath her lashes. 

 

She noted how Changbin's hand seemed to move before his mind, stroking through her cousins freshly dyed hair. What surprised her even more, was how Felix's eyes fluttered shut, inching closer under Changbins ministrations.  _Oh yea,_ she thought,  _something is definitely going on there._  

"I-I like the new hair colour," Changbin stuttered. He had seen bleached hair it's not like this was a new thing, but Felix fascinated him. Drew him in and made him want to stay close to him. _Shit,_ he thought, a breathy chuckle leaving him as Felix stared back at him.  _I think I like him._

 

Felix's heart was racing. When he felt Changbin's hand in his hair, he thought he had died. He was brought back however, when Changbin began stroking his hair gently. Not entirely massaging it, yet his touch alleviated the tenderness Felix was feeling from the bleach. Felix didn't know what to say, or what to do, so he did what he usually does when he's nervous. He rambled. 

 

“H-Hyunjin says he might join, I told him I would h-help him out, but I'm not as good at rapping so I can't be sure. A-anyways, uhm yea. When we went to the place to sign up I saw the list and  I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw them in the line up. I-I have to see them. Hyung, can we go?” At Felix's question Changbin tuned in, his brain finally catching up.  

As Changbin's hand fell from his hair, Felix had to bite his lip to hide the whimper that almost left his mouth in protest.  

“Uh-” Changbin tried to find his train of thought as Felix’s honey eyes shined at him. “W-who do we have to see?” Changbin cleared his throat, trying and failing to create distance between him and the younger boy. Felix was really getting to him.

 

Felix rolled his eyes before lifting his phone again. As Changbin held it trying to get a clear view of the screen he felt his heart stop. “3racha hyung!” Felix’s excited statement rattled around in his brain.Time stopped for Changbin at the name. 

 

“You-” Changbin felt like he couldn’t breathe. “You know 3racha?”

 

He prayed the younger would say no. Upon seeing Felix’s beaming smile though, he knew it wasn’t so.

 

“Hyung I’ve been a fan. Even when I was in Australia!” Felix went on to ramble about how 3racha was part of the reason he wanted to pursue music and how they inspired him. Changbin could only stare as he watched the boy he was growing very quickly fond of tell him all about him and his friends.

 

“My favourite member is actually Spear B, his flow is just-”

 

Changbin really felt like he was going to have a panic attack now. Not only was Felix a big fan of his group, but he was a fan of _him._

 

Jimin watched everything from across the table. She quirked her brows, not at Felix’s excited rambling, she was used to that. But the terrified look on Changbins face. _Why does he look so scared,_ she wondered turning her attention to him. His face was pale, eyes wide as he stared at Felix. She watched as he tried to scoot away from her cousin who seemed too excited to realize what he was doing. As she watched him open and closed his mouth, she figured he was either trying to speak or trying to breathe. Possibly both. 

 

“A-a,” Changbin tried to interject.

 

“So we have to go hyung please please please!” Felix’s bottom lip jutted out in an adorable pout and Changbin really felt like he would black out. The blonde in his rambling had somehow moved even closer;  his hand resting just to the side of Changbins hip, effectively pinning him between the table and his only way out. Felix was staring at him straight in the eyes and Changbin felt as if he would faint. He didn't even realize he was holding his breath. 

 

“Felix,” Jimin spoke up stunning both boys. “Give him space to breathe.” She blew her bangs out of her face watching as the colour slowly returned to Changbins face as he inhaled deeply. When he turned and looked at her gratefully, she nodded back before returning to her phone. 

 

“Actually,” Changbin tried again after some deep breaths,” I’m not-”

 

“Felix!” Changbin sighed eyes shooting towards the source of the interruption. As the freckled boy turned his attention away, he felt himself collapse unto the bench. How was he supposed to tell him. Could he even tell him?

 

He watched Felix get up and walk towards the two boys. Both he and Jimin snorted when Felix softly muttered, “he won’t bite you” to the taller of the two. Changbin fought the smirk on his face, some of his worry fading as time passed. He would figure out what to do about _that_ situation later.

 

The shorter of the dark haired duo looked over at Changbin in curiosity as Felix tried to coax them into the courtyard. The taller however, adamantly stayed in the hallway. 

 

Felix rolled his eyes as Hyunjin shook his head again. “Hyunjin, he’s actually really nice,” he stated for what felt like the thousandth time. “Just say hi and-”

 

“And have him beat me up? No way dude.” At that Jeongin rolled his eyes. Quickly, he slapped his brother on the head before stepping into the courtyard.

 

“We have ten minutes until class starts anyways,” the younger pursed his lips, “he can’t kill you and hid your body in ten minutes.”

 

Felix giggled, throwing an arm of Jeongins shoulder walking him towards the table where he left his cousin and friend in silence.

 

 _Friend._ Felix frowned at that. He wasn’t open about his sexuality here, but back in Australia all his close friends and family knew he was gay. That said, as much as he was aware of his crush on Changbin hyung, he couldn’t make any moves. Especially not in Korea. Not until he was sure. But he had to admit, the feeling of Changbins hands in his hair made his heart beat faster. He wanted that again. 

 

He could feel Changbins sharp gaze on him as he walked closer and soon his body heat when he scooched closer on the bench to make space for Jeongin. Even though his hyung was smaller, he was definitely warmer. His mind kept flashing to what happened. How Changbins fingers felt in his hair. How his smaller, yet muscular, from what he could feel, body felt like next to him.

 

For the next ten minutes Felix had to stop himself from imagining every scenario. And not for the first time, what it would be like to have Changbins arms wrapped around him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaah Changbin knows now Felix is his fanboy! Also they like each other!!! Will he tell him he's SpearB? Will Felix meet his idols 3racha? Find out next week! Thanks to everyone supporting this fic if you ever want to find me my tumblr is @hwarang-my-loves


	3. Freckles?

In the few weeks since they’ve met Changbin noticed many of the quirks Felix had. When they ate breakfast in the cafeteria, he poured his milk before his cereal. He played with his hair when he was nervous. He, much to Changbin's amusement, rapped in english while he napped. Lastly, he was infuriatingly persistent and very stubborn. 

 

“Felix, I-I have work.” Changbin stated for the fourth time.

 

“But hyung,” the younger drawled, “I promise I’ll be really quiet and I don’t have anything else to do. Can’t I come with you?”

 

Changbin checked his watch, an exasperated sigh leaving his lips. If he didn't leave soon he would never hear the end of it. For the first time, Changbin wished Jimin was with them, if only so she could tell Felix no for him. But of course the one time he needed her, she wasn’t present. Some after school club with a guy named Jae. 

 

That left Changbin here, in a dilemma where, for the first time, he had to tell Felix no. 

 

“No Felix,” he chokes out, “you can’t come with me.” 

 

The blonde pouts widening his eyes in an attempt to break Changbin. Everyday after school Changbin would disappear as soon as classes ended, always brushing Felix off with “I have work.” Today however, Felix ran like hell to catch him before he got on the bus. He wanted to hang out with him today and if it meant he had to pout and beg he was ready to do it. 

 

“Why not?” Felix whined. “Hyung, are you ashamed or something?”

 

Changbin took a step back at that. He wasn’t ashamed of his work. He definitely wasn't ashamed of Felix. He loved being a part of 3racha. That however was the problem. He was part of an underground group that Felix happened to be a fan of. Not only that, their moral code was to never reveal themselves, that was a big part of their appeal to fans. The mystery of who they are - he didn't want to ruin that for Felix.

Still as he looks at the pleading blonde, he can’t help wanting to break their moral code. Felix would love the studio. Even though it was just a soundproofed shed in Chan’s backyard, he knew the boy would enjoy every minute of being there. He would love writing lyrics. Not to mention his mix of Korean and English would go well with their leader  Chan. All the possibilities ran through his mind then. Felix knowing about that part of his life. Felix falling asleep on the old yet comfy sofa Jisung’s mom gave them. Felix being _ there.  _ Still, he knew he couldn’t just bring an outsider to the studio. He would have to ask- maybe even beg first. 

 

“Felix,” he started, clearing his throat “where I work isn’t somewhere I can talk with you or even really pay attention to you. It’s also not the safest place to be. Not to mention I work late, really really late.” 

 

Changbin met disappointed honey eyes when he looked up. He tried to find any excuse, and even though all he said was true, to his ears he knew they were just that- excuses. Chan’s house really was in a worse off part of town, and most times they did sleep in the studio. Especially with the Rap Showcase coming up in two weeks. Changbin had to prepare for competition. 3racha were the reigning champions two years in a row and they were desperate to win this year. Not only that, Felix was adamant about going seeing as Hyunjin passed his audition. He wanted to make him proud, even if he didn't know it was him. 

 

“You can’t come with me this time, we can hang out some other time okay?” he sighed, hoping Felix would let it go.  _ Please freckles, don’t fight me on this,  _ Changbin added silently. 

 

Felix knew he was being irrational. Just as Changbin noticed Felix’s quirks, Felix made note of all his hyungs habits. He cleared his throat before he said something serious. He never ate the beans that were in his rice cakes. He like playing in Felix’s hair. Lastly when he was uncomfortable he would scratch at the tattoo on his wrist. Felix had yet to see what the tattoo actually said, but he knew it was special to Changbin and was a source of comfort for him. 

 

Felix watched as his hyung scratched at the collar by his wrist just above his tattoo. Asking about his job always made Changbin uncomfortable, and it was the one thing he never talked about. Everytime Felix asked about it, Changbin would always answer with short, cryptic sentences. He obviously didn’t want Felix there, wherever it was, and as much as he wanted to spend time with him, Felix had to accept that. 

  
  


Taking a deep breath,he nodded solemnly. “Okay."

 

Changbin couldn’t stand seeing his ray of sunshine so downtrodden. Clearing his throat he lifted Felix’s chin to meet his eyes. “How about we hang out tomorrow? Its the weekend and I don’t have work. We can go to an arcade or something?” Felix often talked about loving retro arcade games, and he knew just the place to take him. Even if he couldn't share 3racha with him he could share other things. 

 

A small smile graced Felix's face. “ I would love that.” 

 

Changbin nodded, content to see Felix smiling. “Great, I’ll text you then.” 

 

“Hyung,” Felix started, just as Changbin went to move, “I’m sorry for pushing- about going to work with you.” 

 

“It’s okay Freckles, I know you’re just curious.”

 

Both boys stopped. For what felt like eternity they didn’t move, they didn’t speak, and both of them were positive the other stopped breathing as well. Changbin still had a hand on Felix’s chin. Felix still smelled like strawberries. Both of them became aware of just how close they were. Slowly, Changbin felt his face heat up and watched as Felix himself, turned a light shade of pink. 

 

“F-freckles?” he questioned softly.

 

Changbin felt his blush rising, stumbling backwards, he tried to ignore the look on the youngers’ face. Just over Felix’s shoulder he saw his bus approaching and took the chance to escape. 

 

“O-oh look there’s my bus,” he stuttered, leaving Felix's question unanswered. “See you tomorrow.”

 

Before Felix could answer, Changbin turned away, running to catch the bus. Felix watched him go, trying and failing to still the flutter his heart felt. He stayed rooted, repeating the moment that just happened. The name had once been a source of teasing for Felix, his friends making fun of the constellation of pigment on his skin. But now Changbin turned it into a term of endearment, and Felix couldn’t help melting. 

 

“ _ Freckles,”  _ Felix thought. He pictured Changbin’s half smile and imagined how he would look with a full smile. 

 

Changbin’s bus was long gone, and the school had begun to empty out before Felix moved. When he did, it was only due to Hyunjin snapping his fingers in front of him. 

 

“Hello, earth to gang-member-lover!” 

 

Felix pushed the snapping hands out of his face, feeling the glow, that never really left his face, intensify. Jeongin and Hyunjin were part of JYPs dance troupe and they were still sweaty from practice, Felix noticed.

 

“Gang-member-lover?” he questioned. 

 

“Yea,” Hyunjin replied, turning to look in the direction of Felix's gaze, "Did you send him off? You still have stars in your eyes." 

 

“I think the shocking thing is he looks at you the same way.” Jeongin chimed in a cheeky smile on his face. 

 

Felix looked between the two brothers. He never openly told either of them about his sexuality, but the brothers made it abundantly clear that they knew of his affection for Changbin and didn’t care. Still Felix wasn’t sure. He’d misjudged people before. Trying to quell the panic in the pit of his stomach he gulped.

 

“H-how I look at him?” Felix queried, curious what the dark haired duo would say. They were his closest friends besides Changbin and Jimin. Though, Jimin didn’t truly count, she was his cousin. He had become attached to the brothers in the month he’s been here, and to lose them over this would be heartbreaking. 

 

“Honestly,” the youngest said, rolling his eyes, oblivious to Felix’s inner turmoil, “you still don’t know about your crush on him hyung?”

 

“You look at him like he’s the moon or something.” Hyunjin fake gagged. 

 

Felix was shocked. This wasn’t what he thought they would say. The looked at him with clear eyes and not ones filled with sneering. Instead of yelling slurs at him, they were...teasing him. 

 

“B-but hes a boy.” Felix choked out.

 

“Yeah,” Hyunjin said, “and so are we. The sky is blue and our school has too many courtyards. None of that stops the fact that you’re clearly in love with him.” 

 

“S-so, you guys are, okay with- you know - how did you even know that I was…” Felix trailed off.

 

“Felix-hyung,” Jeongin said gently, taking a step closer. “We had our suspicions, but weren’t sure till just now. Still, that doesn’t change anything.”

 

Hyunjin nodded behind his brother, smiling at Felix softly. “Some people don’t accept it, but we do and hopefully gang-member will too.”

 

They had just accepted him. In ways some of his other friends in Australia never did. In ways he knew not everyone could.

 

“And if he doesn’t…” Hyunjin continued, pulling Felix from the verge of bawling.

 

“If he doesn’t?” Felix rose an eyebrow at that, trying frantically not to cry.

 

Hyunjin shrugged. “Then I guess I’ll have to get beat up defending you.” 

 

Felix looked between the brothers standing before him. He knew how Korean culture was and even though more people were coming out,  being gay still was widely unaccepted. Leaning forward he pulled the brothers,  _ his brothers,  _ into a tight hug. Ignoring the tears falling down his cheeks he laughed gleefully. Even though he never voiced it, he was always burdened by hiding that part of himself from them. Now that they knew, however, Felix felt like he could finally breathe. He could be himself. 

 

“I love you guys. Thank you.” 

 

“Don’t thank us hyung.” Jeongin said as he stopped squirming, patting Felix’s back. “It’s normal to love anyone no matter what gender or sexuality you are.” 

 

“But seriously,” Hyunjin said as the trio broke apart, “did you have to fall for the one guy in the school who could round up his buddies and kill us if you guys fight?” 

 

Felix rolled his eyes, swinging an arm of Jeongins shoulder walking to the bus stop. 

 

“I mean it!” Hyunjin called after them, running to catch up. “What if they find out where we live-”

  
  
  



	4. Dumb crushes and Dumber Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changbin's backstory is revealed and he gets some help planning his 'not-date' with Felix!

 

As Changbin watched Felix’s form get smaller he tried to still his racing heart. His head spun as his body dropped into the nearest empty seat. He called him Freckles. Out Loud! It was a nickname he had for Felix for some time, in fact he saved Felix’s number under that name; a secret he kept well hidden from him. Until now. 

 

“I’m so stupid,” he muttered silently. 

 

As the landscape outside changed from lush green yards and high fences to graffitied walls and brick homes, his mind stayed on the blonde he left behind. How he held unto him without question. How brightly Felix smiled at him. How he pouted whenever Changbin had to leave him behind. Changbin himself hated saying no to Felix, but he wasn't sure about introducing him to his friends and he wasn't sure if he wanted to get closer beyond the rare bond they formed. Changbin had never been this worked up about someone. The last time he had a crush, it went… badly. Absentmindedly, his fingers graze his tattoo. A double knot. A promise of love, friendship and affection. Once upon a time Changbin thought he had found that for himself.

 

_____

_ 3 years ago.  _

 

_ “You promise you’ll get yours tomorrow right?” Changbin asked earnestly as he filled out the forms. He wasn’t squeamish with needles, but a tattoo was permanent he had to be sure. _

 

_ “Of course,” said the teasing voice on the other side of the line.  Changbin believed him. Changbin always believed him.  _

 

_ The day was almost too hot and the tattoo hurt like hell, but there it was a simple black and white outline of a double knot. He loved it. Almost as much as he loved him.  _

 

_ “A promise of friendship, love and affection,” Changbin whispered as he left the parlour.  _

 

_ He was excited to show him tomorrow. To watch him get his matching tattoo. But that never happened.  _

 

_ “He actually got it!” The tallest one sneered.  _

 

_ “Look, there’s the proof that he’s just a no good f-” _

 

_ “No don’t say it he might cry!” Changbin stared at the boy he loved. The boy he thought loved him.  _

 

_ “H-hyung..” Changbin’s voice came out broken, raw and laced with betrayal. “I don’t-” _

 

_ “What?” The boy sneered, his eyes wild and cunning. “You thought I would get a matching tattoo? With you? It was a bet shortcakes. Speaking of which all of you pay up!”  _

 

_ Changbin watched in horror as the snickering group handed forward various bills, all of which the boy he loved stuffed in his pockets.  He was hurt, he was betrayed and he was angry. He turned to leave when the voice he grew to love called out to him.  _

 

_ “Did you think we would let you go so easily?”  _

 

_ Changbin fought back. Hard. But there was more of them than there was of him. Even as his face got scratched, his fingers torn and bloody, it was his tattoo that burned hotter than anything else.  _

  
__________  
  


Changbin had to jump quickly before he missed his stop. The memory of his burned past made him lose track of time and his surroundings. It always did. He received many beatings after that day. He was always in fights on the streets, in school, even in the very neighbourhood he walked through now. They would call him the worst of names as they beat him. Leave him bloodied and passed out wherever they pleased. The worst part was  _ he  _  was always there. Even if he didn’t participate he would watch. Some sadistic pleasure at watching the boy who trusted him with everything, be hurt for who he was. Changbin never forgave him for that. He learned the various ways to avoid meeting those boys, even by coincidence. How to hide if he had to, how to defend himself best he could. When he switched schools he put up with the reputation he gained at JYP, only because nobody hurt him there. They were all too scared of him, and as the rumours grew he found he enjoyed the peace of not being bothered for who he was. That didn't stop his past from haunting him. 

 

If it wasn’t for Chan and Jisung he would’ve end up in even more fights than he did. They found him one day mid beating, bloodied and on the verge of passing out. They helped him when they didn't have to, showed him it was okay to trust people who weren't his family again. They showed him how to fight through his demons using music. Chan would drive him to school, and then both he and Jisung would walk Changbin home. The fought his attackers with him, when they didn’t have to, dealt with the loss of people they once called their closest friends because they stood up for him and he always appreciated that. Changbin wasn’t much for words, but with those two, he found it hard to hide from them. They saw him in his worst places and for that Changbin was eternally grateful. 

 

Still, as he walked into the studio and toed off his shoes, he couldn’t help thinking about Felix again. He liked him of course but he was scared. He wanted to believe Felix didn’t have the capability of his past love, but then again he thought that boy was just as innocent and kind. Look how that went. 

 

“Uh oh, he’s thinking again, hyung look.” He heard a rather cheeky voice say. 

 

“Ah Jisung, you’re right look he’s biting his lip and everything.” Chan snarked as he also looked at him from behind the computer screen.

 

“Shut up,” Changbin muttered, falling next to Jisung on the tired brown couch. 

 

“So,” Jisung said teasingly, moving into Changbin's  face with his head leaning against his hand. “How was school? Did you make any other friends today?” 

 

Instead of answering, Changbin pushed Jisung out of his space with a tired sigh. The orange haired boy simply laughed sitting up again. 

 

“What no news about our biggest fan?” Chris stopped his arrangements and looked at him with a smile. “I wanna know about my fellow Aussie. When can I meet him?” 

 

Felix's pouting image flashed infront of him at Chans question. Would it be okay for Felix to meet these two? He was very protective, not just about their identity as 3racha, but of Jisung and Chan. They were his closest friends. The only people he trusted. 

 

“We’re supposed to be anonymous.” Changbin rolled his eyes. The pair turned to him with rapt attention and Changbin braced himself for the teasing that had become ritual since he first mentioned Felix to them.

 

"Does he want to meet us?" 

 

"I bet he does, doesn't he Channie-hyung?"

 

"Oh yes Jisung, and I would like to meet him, wouldn't you?"

 

Changbin placed his head in his hands as his two friends continued their banter. He was hesitant to bring Felix to the studio, yes, but he definitely didn't want to let these two loose around him . A shiver caressed his spine imagining all the crap Jisung would spill about him.  _Definitely not,_ he thought. He had a reputation to uphold 

 

‘Why don’t you want him to meet us?” Jisung asked, pressing his nose against Changbins neck only to be shoved off. 

 

“Yeah,” Chan followed, wheeling his chair closer. “We’re cool dudes, and you said he's in music so he must be a cool dude too.”

 

“ Not only that, he likes  _ Changbin  _ hyung, of all people too,” Jisung stressed. “That’s enough for me to wonder about him.”

Changbin let out an affronted groan. "What's that supposed to mean?"

 

"Hyung you're not the easiest person to befriend you know," Jisung said laughingly. Even though they were close now, it had taken Changbin close to a year to be as open with them as he was now. 

"Actually..." Changbin started. Both boys looked on eagerly at that. He couldn't help chuckling as they gave him their full attention. The looked like little kids waiting for a prize; Jisung with his bright orange hair that clashed with his oversized blue tee, and Chan in his rumpled white t-shirt and fluffy black hair. 

 

"Actually?" Chan questioned. 

 

"He asked to come here with me today." Changbin watched as both faces lit up and instantly regretted telling them. 

 

"Hyung!" Jisung exclaimed, running to the door and opening it. "Where is he? Is he on the next bus? What's his real name I don't want to be calling him Freckles that's a you thing."

 

"Jisung, close the door your letting the cold air out," the eldest chided.

 

Pouting, the youngest closed the door before resuming his questions on where Felix was and why Changbin hadn't brought him. He mentioned Felix to them the first day they met, and over time he's told them small things about him. He has blonde hair, he's Australian and most importantly his freckles. In fact Changbin refused to tell them Felix's real name, out of fear that Jisung, with his many connections would find and ambush the poor boy. 

 

“Nobody is supposed to know who we are,” Changbin repeated again. "So I told him no." 

 

" Ah hyung-" Jisung whined. "No fair, I want to meet this blonde boy who has you whipped." He jumped, just managing to dodge Changbin's slap aimed for his head. 

 

“He doesn’t have to meet us as 3racha.” Chan stated, Jisung nodding along rapidly. 

 

Changbin shook his head. "I'll think about it."

 

“How long do you need to think about it?” Jisung questioned, entering Changbin's personal space again. “I want to meet him, so don't take too long. You said he was my age right? Hyung let me make friends my age-"

As he pushed the youngest out of his face he wondered again what it would be like to have Felix here with him. Today wasn’t the first time they had asked to meet him and thinking back to earlier, this was maybe the sixth time Felix had asked if he could come with him to work. Even though he didn't know what Changbin actually did. Lately it was as if everyone and the universe was pushing for Felix to become a bigger part in his life; but Changbin was scared. He couldn’t help the anxieties he felt about everything. About liking someone again. Trusting Felix, who he essentially lied to, with this part of his life. Sighing Changbin stood, ignoring Jisung's ramblings.

 

“Let’s just work on the songs for competition please.” 

 

\-----

“Oh Changbin hyung,” Jisung said behind his noodles.” You’ll never guess who came around asking for you today.”

 

“Who?” Changbin slurped nonchalantly. 

 

“Him.”

 

Changbin looked up from his ramen in shock. 

 

“What did he want?”

 

“Clearly for me to punch him in the face.” Chan grunted before eating another mouthful of ramen. 

 

“No,” Jisung said, “he just told me he wanted to apologize to you. Asked where you were now and such. I told him it was non of his business anyways but just thought I'd tell you incase he shows up near you." 

 

Changbin thought it over quickly, before shrugging again. “I don’t want his apology.”  He slurped the rest of his noodles ending that conversation. 

 

Changbin could feel that tonight was one of those nights he would sleep at the studio. Chan was tapping his pencil against his now extremely fluffed hair, while Jisung lay upside down on the couch. 

 

“It helps with thinking,” he said when Changbin asked him why he did that. “Makes all the blood flow to your brain and stimulates ideas and such.” 

 

“Or could make your brain fill with blood and then you pop a blood vessel and die.” Chan said amidst his pacing. 

 

Changbin rolled his eyes as the two began arguing over what was biologically possible. Taking his phone to text his mom that he would be staying at Chans’ he was shocked to see he already had a text message unread. 

 

Fr: Freckles

_ Hey hyung I know you said you would text me, but I was just wondering where the arcade is? And what time should we meet :)  _

 

“So what time you gonna meet him?” Changbin jumped as Jisung’s voice came from over his shoulder. 

 

“Meet who?” Chan asked. 

 

“Freckles,” Jisung drawled cheekily, pointing at the phone. 

 

“Oooooh,” Chan smiled, “like a date?” 

 

“No," Changbin blushed, looking between the pair, “it’s not a date. We’re just hanging out. Since I told him he couldn't come with me and I've been blowing him off all week.” 

 

Swiftly typing his answer back to Felix, the three of them watched as his phone lit up with an instant response. 

 

“Jesus,” Jisung laughed, “was he waiting for you to text him back or something?” 

 

“Shut up,” Chanbin said, his face growing hotter at the thought of Felix staring at his phone waiting for it to go off. 

 

Fr Freckles: 

_ 1 sounds great, I’ll actually be awake. See you at the arcade! xx. _

 

“At one? At the arcade?” Chan’s voice came from behind him this time. “Which one? Is it that retro one by that place that sells really good chicken?” 

 

Changbin moved, hiding his phone to his chest. “No it’s not, you don’t know the place.” 

 

“It’s definitely that one,” Jisung said. “Can we come?”

 

“No.”

 

“Why you gonna make kissy kissy?” The younger puckered his lips, when Changbin grabbed one of the small pillows and threw it at his face. 

 

“You really like him don’t you.” Chan stated. It had been a while since Changbin liked anyone, and Chan was happy for him. But after the last time, he was still highly protective of his friend. 

 

Changbin thought over Chan’s words. Of course he liked Felix. He liked him alot. Felix was this bright ray of sunshine that shined on his life serendipitously. Even though he didn’t know him very long, Changbin wanted to get to know him. If anyone messed with the boy, he knew he would fight for him. He would defend him as he would Chan or Jisung. Only unlike the two idiots he considered family, he wanted more than just to protect Felix. He wanted to hold his hand, he wanted to play in his hair. He wanted to sing to him and write raps for him. He wanted to kiss-

 

“Yeah,” he said gently, stopping both Chan and Jisung’s banter over games. “I-I  guess I like him alot.” 

 

It had been a while since Jisung saw his hyung like this. He wasn’t there for the beginning of Changbin’s past, but he met him in the aftermath and hoped with every fiber of his being it wouldn’t happen again. Still, he knew it was only right to support his hyung in this. Besides, this gave him free teasing material. 

 

“Then hyung,” he started, patting the couch, “take a seat, we’re gonna plan out this date to perfection.” 

 

“It’s not a date.” Neither boy listened to Changbins grumbling. 

 

The rest of the night, competition was put on the back burner. Instead the studio was filled with Jisung telling him where to take Felix , and the best method to an Aussies heart via Chan.  By the end of it, Changbin felt like his head was swimming and his anxiety raced thinking about it. Still he couldn't help acknowledging that for the first time in years he was genuinely excited. 

_ It's still not a date. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAH We finally meet Chan and Jisung! The 'not-date' is next week let me know how you feel!!


	5. Its Not A Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changbin and Felix have alot of fun. Jimin, Hyunjin and Jeongin meet Jisung and Chan. Two snarky waiters a new favourite place and finally we get to meet Him.

“Jimin it’s not a date!” 

 

Felix rolls his eyes for the umpteenth time, burying himself within his closet to hide his heated flush.  He pulls yet another shirt from the rack, before replacing it and taking another. He has an hour before he meets Changbin at the arcade and he still doesn't have an outfit. Jimin’s non-stop questioning doesn’t help either. 

 

“If it’s not a date then you wouldn’t mind if I tagged along, right?” Felix pauses, before shaking his head.

 

“You’ve been around him for almost two months and you still don’t trust that I’ll be okay  _ alone _ with him?” 

 

“I’m just saying,” she shrugs, “since it’s not a  _ date, _ then there’s no reason I can’t come.” 

 

“If I say it’s a date will you stay here?” 

 

“Maybe.” 

 

An exasperated sigh leaves Felix’s lips. As much as he wants it to be a date, an it most certainly is  _ not,  _ that doesn’t mean he wants Jimin there. 

 

“Look, I-I’ll bring the pepper spray okay?” Felix leans over, throwing the mini pepper spray into his jacket pocket. “Happy? Please don’t come.” 

 

Jimin watches as her cousin changes his shirt again before moving on to his hair. When she asked if he wanted to hang out today, she should have been surprised to hear that he was hanging out with Changbin. The older boy always shut Felix down whenever he asked to see him outside of school, but here they were, spending the whole afternoon together from what Felix said. As she watched him murmur to himself whether he should wear a headband or not, she made her mind up then. She was going on that date; not that Felix would know that. 

 

“Don’t wear the headband, you’ll look stupid.” 

 

___

 

Changbin’s eyebrow twitched as Jisung spoke.

 

“Hyung, if you touch another black t-shirt I’m going to burn it.”

“What’s wrong with this, it’s nice.”

 

“I don’t know maybe the fact that you’re going on a date not to a funeral!”

 

“I might be going to one soon if you don’t shut up!” 

 

Changbin and Jisung had a fair share of clothes at Chan’s house, and although it wasn’t his entire closet, the basic pieces were there to make an outfit. If only Jisung would stop bitching about his choices. This was the fifth time he changed clothes and he had about an hour before he had to go.

 

Chan put down his coffee. “Okay, okay, Han leave Changbin alone before he throws you out of the window. Changbin…. no murder in the house please, I just cleaned the carpets.” He walked over to the closet before turning back to the pair. “How about this?” 

 

As he dressed, he thought about where he would take Felix today. The arcade would take up a a good chunk of time but, they were bound to get hungry, and he’d seen Felix eat, they needed alot of food. He was looking forward to the  _ not  _ date, but he couldn’t help the nerves that flooded him. He had been down this road once before, was he ready to do this again?

 

“Hyung...” Chan looks up as Changbin steps out of the bathroom. “Do I look okay?” 

 

His friend turns rather unsurely, gnawing at his lip. Chan had only seen Changbin nervous a handful of times, mostly during competitions, this time however was different. 

 

Changbin wondered if he was too casual, with the white t-shirt, flannel hoodie and dark wash jeans. Chan hadn’t said anything yet and he considered changing.

 

“Yea you look nice.” Chan rose, watching Changbin nod distantly. “What are you worried about? I know it’s not about your clothes.” 

 

“I-I just...what if...I mean I just….what if he doesn’t have fun?” 

 

His eyes were wide and panicked, thoughts swirling a mile a minute behind them. Chan gripped his shoulders and gave him a brotherly smile. 

 

“He’ll have fun, just be yourself okay?” 

 

“Okay.” 

 

_ Just be yourself -  _ he thinks to himself as he walks towards the arcade. Taking deep breaths, Changbin stops in front of the cafe across from the arcade. 

 

“I can do this,” he mutters, “besides, it’s not a date.” 

 

His eyes scan quickly for a luminous head of blond hair. He’s about to text Felix that he arrived when a heavy weight lands on his back. 

 

“Hyung!” 

 

Changbin moved to throw the weight off him, when a flash of blonde moves in his peripheral, soon followed by freckles and a bright smile. 

 

“Felix, jesus, you scared me.” As the younger climbs off him, he tries to ignore the dip in his stomach at the loss of warmth. 

 

“Were you waiting long?” His eyes are shiny as always, and Changbin chooses to shake his head instead of answering with words. 

 

Inside the pair find it rather easy to slip into discussion. The sound of Felix’s laughter stands above the screams and clanging of various machines, and Changbin loves it. They stock up on tokens before making their rounds, choosing games they want to play. 

 

Changbin hasn’t felt this happy in a long time. The bad pop music is drowned out by the loud noises of the arcade, and like when he was younger, it still smells like greasy food and metal. Felix has taken to holding his hand to pull him to a different game and he wouldn’t have it any other way. After they finally relinquish the air hockey table, he watches as Felix gasps, before locking hands and dragging him to a newer section of the arcade.

 

“The Walking Dead?” Changbin says rather unsurely, staring at the VR box before them. 

 

“Yea like the show, so what you do is-” Felix rambles on about the rules and how to play as they wait for the boys before them to finish up their round. 

 

His hand is still locked tightly in Felix’s warm grasp and Changbin has to actively force himself to focus on what he’s saying.

 

Changbin is terrified as the zombies on screen start to come after him. Felix laughs out of the corner of his eye and despite his fear it helps him to see the younger boy having so much fun. Their screams mix in with the noise of the arcade and Changbin decides this is the best day of his life. 

 

~

 

Jimin watches from behind a menu as her cousin laughs, loudly while Changbin screeches at another zombie. She noted that despite the difference in jackets, they were both wearing white t-shirts and jeans.  _ Boys,  _ she thinks shaking her head. 

 

The cafe adjoined to the arcade was the perfect hideout spot for her to watch what happened. The large bay windows kissing the side of her booth, gave an unobstructed view. Still all her cousin had to do was glance up and he could spot her, and despite the fact that she wore her blonde hair hidden beneath one of his black caps, she still hoped that and the menu would obstruct her face.

 

She peers carefully above the menu again when her train of thought is interrupted.

 

“He looks like he’s having fun,” she hears a familiar voice say from close by. 

 

“Of course he’s having fun he’s on a date.” 

 

“Ew are they matching?” She listens carefully now, curious if the voices were talking about Felix.

 

“Why are we even here hyung, we established that he likes Felix-hyung too.” 

 

That statement has her turning peering into the cafe, searching for the pair obviously talking about her cousin and his date. A table away, on the higher tables with stools, she spots the familiar outline of Felix’s friends- Hyun something and his brother jeonghyun?

 

“Hey you two,” she says sharply. “What are you doing here?” 

 

The brothers focus on her, shocked but not entirely surprised to see Felix’s cousin holding her menu up similar to them. They were one table away, it’s almost shocking they didn’t see her sooner. Hyunjin smiles.

 

“The same thing you are apparently.” 

 

Jimin couldn’t help but chuckle. Glancing quickly to make sure Felix and Changbin don’t spot her she quickly motions for them to join her in the booth, which they do, bringing their menus along. 

 

“When did you get here?” 

 

“They were playing on the dancemania machine.” The one with braces said. “You?”

 

“I took the bus ten minutes after Felix left the house, so I was here when they were buying tokens.”

 

The three spend some time talking, Jimin asking their names, and catching them up on what they missed.

 

“Oh look, they’re moving!” 

 

They watched attentively as Felix and Changbin stumble out of the game booth pushing each other and laughing loudly. Jimin notes that her cousin isn’t the only one smiling brightly. 

 

“I never knew Changbin could smile like that.” Hyunjin states, voicing her thoughts. 

 

The use of his name however draws the attention of the pair seated in the booth behind them pressed against the wall. Chan and Jisung tore their eyes from their beaming friend to stare at each other.

 

“Did they just say Changbin?” Jisung whispers. 

 

“They did.” 

 

Jisung careful leans over the corner, to see two dark haired boys peering in the same direction they were from behind their menus. Swinging back around he meets Chan with wide eyes. 

 

“They’re looking behind their menus too.” 

 

Carefully Chan rises off the red plastic seat to look over into the booth. The boys are staring at his best friend and his date, and Chan spots the top of another head, seated on the side closest to them.

 

“There’s someone else with them.” He says to Jisung. “Who do you think it is?” 

 

They listen carefully as the trio begin talking again. “Sounds like a girl.” 

 

Seungmin watched the two groups spying from behind the counter. Rolling his eyes he sauntered over clearing his throat, drawing the attention of both tables. 

 

“Either you all buy something, or you get out of the cafe.” Seungmin planted his hands on his hips, peering behind bright red strands at both tables. 

 

“You all?” Jeongin questioned softly. 

 

“Yeah,” he says, a bored scowl on his face, “I assume that you guys are spying on the same people. FYI it’s more obvious when you stand your menus up like that.” 

 

Jimin peers around the corner of the booth only to come face to face with a younger boy with orange hair doing the same thing.

 

“Just buy something, I don’t care what, but unless you do I have to kick you out.” With that Seungmin walks back to the counter, ringing up the old couple who finished their lunch. 

 

Chan rose from his seat, pulling his own cap lower. In the booth sits the dark haired boys he saw before, but the third person is indeed a girl also wearing a cap, he assumes to hide her blonde hair falling out the sides. 

 

“You guys also spying on Changbin and his date?”

 

“Yeah,” she answers. “His date is their friend and my cousin, Felix.” 

 

Jisung swings out of the booth as well, taking a seat next to Hyunjin who practically jumped into Jeongin’s lap. The tension is palpable, but Jisung ignores it choosing to talk instead.

 

“Cool, Changbin-hyung is our friend, we just wanted to see who this Freckles kid was. His name is Felix? Hyung never told us his name.”  

 

Jimin who, instead of answering, made room for Chan to sit, looks back into the arcade searching for the head of blonde hair. While the boys filter in confirmations of Felix’s name, questions about the name  _ Freckles _ , she realizes she can’t find the subjects of conversation. 

 

“Guys, they’re gone.” 

 

The conversation halts as the boys look over into the arcade. Five pairs of eyes scan the area for blonde hair, white t-shirts and bright smiles. Nothing.

 

“Where could they have gone?” Jisung says, eyes moving frantically. 

 

“Are they in one of the games in the back again?”

 

“They left,” came a dry reply. All eyes turn to face the same red headed waiter. 

 

“What?”

 

“The guy with white hair right? Well-”

 

“It’s blonde really.” Hyunjin cuts in.

 

“-while you guys were talking they left. Are you going to order now or-” 

 

“Where did they go?” “Which way did they go?”

 

Both Jimin and Chan asked at the same time, prompting Seungmin to step backwards his hands raised. 

 

“Jesus I don’t know, I wasn’t paying attention, they literally just left the arcade and went that way.” All eyes followed the motion of his hand pointed towards the river. 

 

The quintet sprint from the booth, leaving Seungmin in a mess of menus. Rolling his eyes and fixing the booths he mutters to himself about ‘spying losers taking up space.’

 

~

 

Felix couldn’t imagine this day getting better. He and Changbin hold hands tightly as they sprint out of the arcade and down the street towards the shops by the river. 

 

“Do you think they saw us?” He asked breathlessly. 

 

“No, they were all talking.” 

 

They catch their breaths, laughing softly when their eyes meet. He should have known Jimin would follow him, but when Changbin pointed out Jeongin pressed against the window, they made the decision to leave before the other caught on. Changbin wasn't entirely surprised that Chan and Jisung followed him, but seeing them with Jimin and the dark haired duo threw him off. As he looked at Felix wiping the last of his laughter tears, though, all apprehension left him. 

 

“Are you hungry? I know a great place near here.” 

 

Felix’s stomach answers for him, a blush climbing to his cheeks at the loud growl. A beautiful laugh leaves Changbin at that and Felix is floored at how one man can be so gorgeous. Grabbing hands with the beautiful blonde he pulls him in the right direction. 

 

“C’mon let’s feed you huh.” 

 

The restaurant is barely enough to be called that. The linoleum floors are cracked and peeling, and the place only has six small tables and a few comfy couches. It’s situated in a small hut like structure, with rickety stair and one large window that overlooks the river. The warm of the setting sun fills the place with orange light that reflect off of Felix's hair and Changbin is glad he brought him. He used to visit this place during his time at his other school, and since moving he hadn't been back. But today- with Felix by his side- he can't bring himself to think about his past.

 

“The fried chicken burger here is the best I’ve ever had,” Changbin says, watching Felix look around.

 

The florescent lights give off a red and orange glow, and there are plants everywhere in unusual pots. The menus look like someone wrote on hand towels and laminated them, and a large neon middle finger hangs over the window to the kitchen. Bermuda Triangle plays faintly from the speakers as his eyes drift back to Changbin. 

 

He fits in perfectly here, a tough yet caring man, who much like this place, Felix finds himself quickly enjoying. 

 

The waiter is a kind faced man, who wears an apron with the words ‘Kiss the Chef’ stiched into it. 

 

“Hey Changbin,” he says, “been a while since you’ve been here.” 

 

Changbin stands giving the man a quick hug. “Hey Woojin-hyung. This is my...uh friend.. Felix.” 

 

Felix deflates a bit at the word friend, but smiles up at the older man brightly, shaking his hand. 

 

“Nice to meet you kid. So what can I get you losers?” Changbin rattles off the orders, checking with Felix, who nods in agreement. “Alright, they’ll be out whenever.” 

 

Felix laughs, watching the older man disappear behind a bead curtain. “Does he always answer that way?” 

 

“Yeah,” Changbin nods, “it’s part of his charm.” 

 

The conversation flows as they discuss topics from the arcade, to how Changbin found this place, and a random short game of truth or dare before their food arrives. Felix couldn’t help the groan that left his mouth upon taking a bite of his fried chicken cheese burger. A strange combination, but just as Changbin said, he had to agree it was the best thing he’d ever eaten.

 

"Do you think they'll find us?" Felix asks after they both finish the last of Changbin's fries. 

 

"Nah," he says around another mouthful. "I never told Chan or Jisung about this place." 

 

Felix watches as Changbin's hand grazes over his tattoo. Felix still can't see it clearly, but in the peace of the restaurant, he finds the courage to ask. 

 

“So-” he gulps down another bite of fries, “-what’s your tattoo mean?” 

 

Felix hoped he wasn't overstepping by asking. They've been having a great _not date,_ and he hoped this wouldn't mess it up. To his surprise though, Changbin just began to smile. Gingerly, he rolls his sleeves up showcasing the double knots. They used to be a source of pain for him, but now in his favorite hideout with possibly the most adorable boy in the world, he felt invincible looking at them. 

 

“Th-they’re double knots.” He turns his hand, gasping quietly as Felix’s finger traces the outline. He watches the questions begin to swirl behind caramel eyes and steels himself to answer. Anything Felix wanted to know, Changbin would tell him right now. 

 

“They're nice. I-is there a meaning behind them?”

 

The pair make eye contact, Felix rubbing soothing circles over the ink on his wrist. Changbin is almost lost in the sensation but clears his throat and answers him. 

 

“Actually..” Changbin started. 

 

“It’s a promise of friendship, love and affection.” Both boys looked towards the new voice that interrupted from the corner by the window. 

 

Changbin met brown eyes and a cat-like smile and felt his stomach drop.

 

“Hello Binnie.” 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this is kind of late but tadaaa. I hope you guys liked this chapter I had so many brain farts trying to write it. Let me know in the comments ;)


	6. Bad Boys and Street Rats

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We find out who He is and some magic happens along the way

Previously on Sunshine Rapper:

_“It’s a promise of friendship, love and affection.” Both boys looked towards the new voice that interrupted from the corner by the window._

 

_Changbin met brown eyes and a cat-like smile and felt his stomach drop._

 

_“Hello Binnie.”_

 

___________________

 

Red.

 

Everything around him is suddenly drenched in the vibrant colour and Changbin is sure of only two things. Firstly, that Felix is the only reason he hasn’t bolted from the small room and secondly, Felix is now exposed to Him. He watches in horror as his past rises from his shadowy seat by the window.  Changbin didn’t know how long he was there, but he will do anything to keep Felix from Him.

 

“What?” The boy says, his ever present smirk on his face. “No hello for me? You wound me Binnie.”

 

He looks exactly the same as Changbin remembers. Black hair worn longer in the front than in the back, so he can brush it out of his face. His contacts are clear this time, displaying his natural brown eyes as opposed to whatever colour he felt like wearing. His signature jean jacket is also present, D9 stitched into the back in bright red letters. _District 9 Public_. The beacon of all Changbin’s worst nightmares.

 

Wrenching his hand from Felix’s grasp, Changbin rises as well, his fear of keeping Felix hidden, stronger than the will to protect himself. Moving in front of him, he effectively blocks the boy’s wandering eyes. His past will _never_ meet his present. Over his dead body.

 

“What do you want Minho?”

 

“Ah….so it’s just Minho now? You used to call me hyung at one point.”

 

“What. Do. You. Want?”

 

Changbin feels Felix’s hand grasp his, and has to fight himself not to react. Without breaking eye contact with his past demons, he reaches back and holds Felix in place, a subtle message for him to stay in his seat behind him. Sharp eyes try to look past him, but Changbin is stubborn in his resolve. Blocking Minho’s gaze, Changbin fights the urge to gulp as the boy he used to love, the boy who betrayed him brutally, put all his attention back on him.

 

“I won’t ask you again. Why are you here?”

 

The older boy sighs dramatically, accepting he won’t see who Changbin’s new friend is for now, and takes his seat once more by the window.

 

“I’m here to eat. I haven’t been here in ages and I’ve been starved for Woojin-hyung’s special chilly fries.”

 

Changbin can’t trust his words, not after everything they’ve been through. Thinking of what Jisung told him yesterday he figures that has something to do with it.

 

‘ _He wanted to apologize’. Bullshit._

 

“Chilly fries?” He asks, raising a suspicious eyebrow.

 

“Yes, you know how I loved those dearly. You did introduce them to me after all.”

 

Changbin’s heart began pounding. He remembers that day very clearly. Minho had never had a chilly fry in his life and Changbin was more than happy to introduce him to his special Seoul hideout. He closes his eyes at the scar of a memory before clearing his throat.

 

“Jisung said you went to speak with him. That has nothing to do with why you’re here?”

He watches as Minho clenches his jaw before smiling, a sure sign he’s annoyed. Whether at Jisung for spilling or because his plan to be nonchalant failed. Either way, Changbin stays rooted as the elder mulls over what manipulations to spill his way, and steels himself against them.

 

“Ah yes, your street-rat friend with the clownish orange hair. Jisung? Yeah, I asked him where you were…. did he tell you why?”

 

Jisung told him it was to apologize, but guys like Minho they never apologize. Even if he did, Changbin would never trust or accept it. People like him would never change.

 

“No.”

 

Another smirk crawls unto his face and Changbin’s grasp on Felix’s hand tightens unintentionally. Minho’s sharp eyes follow the movement, and his smirk grows from teasing to cunning.

 

“Hmm, maybe we can meet up and talk about it some other time? When you’re done playing lover with your new boy toy, of course.”

 

Changbin feels his own jaw clenching, his free hand tightening into a fist. _Boy toy?_ He doesn’t notice the tension rising into his shoulders until he feels the warmth of a smaller hand on his. For the first time since Minho made himself known, he breaks his gaze to look at the boy he knows is not a _toy_ to him. Felix had become a ray of light for him. His bubbly smiles and teases made Changbin's day better. He loved his constant rambling and how soft his hair felt. No. Felix was not and never would be a toy to him; not like he was to Minho. 

 

Felix’s eyes are sharp, when they meet Changbin's. He’s understood every word and even though he doesn’t know who the threat to Changbin is, he knows he hurt him in the past. He tightens his hand on Changbin’s, a reassurance that he is here and he won’t leave Changbin. Not now. Hopefully, not ever again.

 

“I don’t think so.” Changbin says, turning away to face Minho again. "I have nothing to say to you and I sure as hell don't want to hear what you have to say."

 

The boy fakes a pout, plush lips jutting out to try and hide another smirk. Through that one interaction he could tell this white-haired boy was something special to Changbin, and he would find out who he was and just how _special_ he was.

 

Standing he tries skirting around Changbin to catch peek of this new _friend._ Stepping closer he can see the glimpse of honey coloured eyes, and freckles. Precious.

 

“Hello,” he says, a cunning smile on his face. “I’m Minho and you are?”

 

“Nobody.” Changbin pushes

 

“Are you Binnie’s new play thing?”

 

“Shut up Minho.”

 

“You know,” Minho pressed, stepping into Changbins personal space. “Little Binnie here and I had a thing. Didn’t end so well.”

 

Changbin could feel himself losing control, he took another step back, his knees pressing against Felix’s thighs. Minho had a way of making him lose himself. Especially in the worst ways.  He didn't want Felix to see him that way. 

 

“Binnie didn’t you tell him about me? How this was our place to hangout?” He stepped closer. “About how you loved when I listened to you rap?”

 

“Minho. Stop.”

 

Another step closer, now he was almost toe to toe and even Felix’s presence was waning on Changbin’s control.

 

“I never did tell you how much money I made the day? I wonder how much your friend wou-”

 

Changbin snapped. He ripped his hand from Felix’s grasp, punching Minho directly on the cheek, knocking him back before he could finish. He could harm him, but Changbin would sooner fight hell before Minho touched Felix. Changbin wasn’t satisfied. Another swing knocked the conniving demon to the ground, blood spurting from his lip. His vision started going dark, and all he could see was Minho, his smirk and blood. He wanted more. 

 

“Ah there’s my Binnie. He never fought me like this thou-”

 

Another hit. This time Changbin saw nothing but red. A dark haze formed in his mind and he wanted Minho’s blood, for him to feel what he felt. The memory of all the beatings, the name calling, the harassment. His tattoo burned like it did that first day. Everything hurt, and the more he thought about Felix being in the position he was, the harder he threw his punches. 

 

Suddenly, a spot of white came into his peripheral vision, but he couldn't stop. His rage was too much. 

 

“Hyung!”

 

Felix jumped on Changbin the minute Minho's head rolled back. He tried pulling him off, yanking on his shirt, calling his name, yet nothing worked. He was scared, not of Changbin but for him. How he would react after he came to his senses. After he came back to him. He wasn’t listening to him and Felix shook with the need to bring him back. _His hyung._ Not the one this guy brought out.

 

“Changbin hyung please!”

 

Changbin heard the deep cries through a tunnelled wave. It was if his anger was rolling over him, controlling every part of him. All the hurt and betrayal came forward and he wanted Minho to pay.

 

“Hyung please!” Felix’s voice came out in a cry. He didn’t know what else to do. He had to make a choice, and it scared him like hell, but for Changbin, Felix was willing to do anything. 

 

Changbin tried to ignore the soothing voice that called out to him. All he wanted was revenge. Suddenly he was shoved backwards and everything went bright. His lips were warm. Everything smelled like strawberries. He could hear his own heart beating. The world was going back to normal. Red faded to pink then to white. Platinum. Changbin felt like he was holding his breath before, and now he reached the surface. He was okay.

 

He felt the tension in his body melt away as Felix's warm lips covered his. They were soft, slightly chapped from his habit of biting them and gentle as they pressed against his own. Before him he could see Felix, eyes pressed shut, remnants of tears on his pigmented cheeks. Closing his own eyes, he pressed into him, to let him know he was here. All too quickly, the warmth faded and Changbin was left wanting more. 

 

"Hyung?" 

 

Felix's lips were glistening, his eyes teary. Seeing the man he loved filled with hatred and rage, it hurt him.  But that kiss helped him, feeling Changbin press against him gave him all the courage in the world. He forgot about Minho, he forgot where they were. In that moment it was him and Changbin, who had accepted him. 

 

Slowly, he raised a hand and gently wiped away the lone tear that escaped Changbin's eyes. Hearing Minho shuffle around, Felix knew his time was up, but they would revisit this moment. Changbin was now his, and Felix wouldn't have anyone hurt him again. 

 

Woojin saw everything from the kitchen. He heard, rather than saw Minho’s arrival and got to slapped some cold chilly on fries to make his way out when Changbin jumped him. Before he could act however, the smaller boy he thought would be defenseless, started pulling Changbin off and eventually brought him back.

 

He looked back at Minho who was sat next to a knocked over plant, waking up from where Changbin knocked him down. Licking at his bloody lip, the boy shook the daze from his eyes, coming too in time to see Felix part from Changbin. He rarely dropped by after his fallout with Changbin, if only because he knew Woojin was not on his side. Stalking forward, Woojin blocks the boys view of Changbin and Felix. Refusing to let him wreak more havoc on them for today.

 

“Here are your fries. Now get out.”

 

Minho catches the bundle an affronted gasp leaving his lips. “Oh come on Woojin-hyung, is that anyway to treat a beloved dongsaeng you haven’t seen in so long?”

 

“The only thing I would love to see is to your ass out of my restaurant. Leave before you give me the pleasure throwing you out.”

 

Minho looks between Changbin, still sat on the floor gazing at Felix, and Woojin, finally settling his gaze on the white-haired boy staring wide eyed, from behind him. He gives a tiny wave before he’s blocked once more by a scowling Woojin.

 

“I won’t say it again kid. Get out.”

 

Standing, Minho pushes his noir locks from his face before slapping a bill on the table. This isn’t his last chance to see his special rapper again. Or his new _friend._

 

“See you around Binnie,” he looks around him before waving, “and toy.”

 

Only then does Changbin return his gaze, glaring heatedly and full of contempt. As he brushes past a red haired kid in the doorway, disappearing from sight, he promises himself that Changbin will be his again.

 

“District 9?” The red head says stepping into the restaurant, glancing at the overturned flower pot and the two boys sat on the floor. “Hyung, I know this place is a dump but I didn’t know you let trash bastards eat here?”

 

“I don’t. Get in the kitchen.”

 

Felix, remained quiet, bringing his gaze back to Changbin. That was a side of him he had never seen before. Protective and scared, filled with rage and hurt. He watches as the man he loves deflate even more, shoulders rolling forward, his head lolling into his hands. Without saying anything, Felix wraps his arms around him and feels relief at the feeling of Changbin hugging him back.

 

Changbin was mortified. How could he let himself explode like that because of Minho? His ex- if he could even call him that- made him into a worse person, but he wanted to be better. Do better. For Felix.  His mind drifted to the kiss. Minho never kissed Changbin, always making excuses and any kisses he had with girls he never counted. Soaking in the warmth of Felix's arms around him he tightens his own. Felix was his first true kiss. The first person, he decided, who deserved much more than he could ever offer.

 

“Freckles?” he questions softly.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Thank you.”

 

Without words, Felix knew the thank you was not just for the kiss but for being there for him. For not leaving when he could have. For staying by Changbin's side despite seeing the worst parts of him on their first 'not date'. But Felix wouldn't have it any other way. He loved Changbin showing him parts of himself others never saw. He would take all of him, as he was with no remorse.

 

“Of course hyung,” the younger said, still shielding Changbin with his body. “I’ll always be here.”

 

He had never seen Changbin react that way to people at JYP before, and if the red head was right District 9 was Changbin’s old high school. He never talked about it, much like his job, and so Felix knew nothing other than that’s where Changbin’s alleged gang years started. Seeing it now though, Felix is sure it wasn’t gang fights, but self defence that Changbin had to endure.

 

“Hyung,” he whispers gently in Changbin’s ear. “I don’t know who that guy was-”

 

Changbin tenses in his arms and Felix quickly soothes him, stroking his hair like he usually does for him.

 

“-but now is a good time to let you know that I’m a second degree black belt in taekwondo, and if he comes again, I’ll be right there to help you.”

 

Felix pulls back, looking Changbin in the eyes only to find them filled with tears. He felt his heart clench. To him, Changbin was the strongest person he had ever met, and in the past month nobody came close to making him feel the way he does right now.

 

“I’ll protect you hyung. I promise.”

 

Changbin doesn’t respond besides a light breath of air from his nose, brushing against the nape of Felix’s neck. Still he doesn’t let go, tightening his arms even more, around the boy as if hoping he never has to act on his words.

 

Woojin watched from the kitchen, shushing his cousin when he tries to talk about some idiots that were spying on people at his part time job again. He had never seen Changbin like this except once, after his fallout with Minho. Changbin had cried in the very booth he sat in today, face cut and bleeding with large bruises forming all over his body. Woojin promised himself then, that he would look out for the kid best he could, checking in on him, and cooking him meals, but he never got involved during fights. Some of those boys were friends of his, Minho especially, was someone he knew closely and he never felt like he had the right to choose sides.

 

Now as he watches the blond with the freckles vow to use his martial arts to fight for him, to protect him, Woojin silently does the same. He let his qualms about being impartial cloud the right judgement, and he was wrong.  If Changbin needed it, he would fight for him, he would help him, like he should have back then.

 

__________________

 

“Hyung just call him again.”

 

Chan rolled his eyes as Jisung groaned again. They had found their way back to the cafe by the arcade. The red head waiter was replaced by a taller skinny blonde guy that Jimin recognized immediately. As the gang recovered from their search, she spilt the beans about what happened.

 

“Jisung, if his calls didn’t go through the first time what would make you think they would go through now?”

 

“Felix also isn’t answering.” Jimin chimed up from her seat near the bar. “They probably got sick of us calling or something.”

 

Before Jisung could reply he spots a familiar figure walking by the cafe from the direction the waiter pointed them in. He was smirking, but his lip was busted and cheek forming into a nasty bruise. As usual he had the tell tale signs of being the piece of shit Jisung knew he was, but he didn’t think it was a coincidence that he was walking from where his hyung was and he was bruised. His mind flashed to when Minho said he would find Changbin, and instantly Jisung saw red.

 

“Jisung wait!”

 

He was out the door before Chan could grab him, blood boiling, and pinned Minho up against the cafe glass.

 

“Where is he?!”

 

“Ah it’s the Chucky look alike?”

 

Jisung tightened his hold.

 

“Where is he Minho? Did you hurt him?”

 

The elder rolled his eyes, shoving Jisung off him. Glancing at Chan standing close-by, he smirked before turning back to Jisung.

 

“He’s in hiding with his boy toy,” he leaned closer licking his lips. “But I’ll tell you a secret. He’s the one who gave me the shiner so you don’t have to worry about him.”

Jisung growled, set to attack again when Chan held him back. He was usually a fun, carefree guy, but when it comes to the trash before him and his friends Jisung had no patience for his bullshit.

 

“Let him go, he’s no use to us.” Chan hated him as much as Jisung did, but finding Changbin, especially since he had a run in with Minho to the point of beating him.

 

Minho laughed. “Ah I’m hurt. None of you seem to like me anymore.”

 

Jisung strained against Chan’s hold, and he was tempted to let him go, however he caught the faces of Felix’s friends in the window and held on. Fighting would do them no good, especially since they seemed to think they were in a gang already.

 

Minho turned to see the group staring at him beyond the glass. The girl had blonde hair much like Changbin’s boy toy, and the dark haired duo stared at the trio with a glint of fear. Minho smirked again before turning back to the pests before him.

 

“Let’s go Jisung.”

 

Minho waved condecenly at them before he turned on his heel and kept walking. Today sure was interesting. One trip to the Han River and he gets to see the one person he’s been looking for, his new boy toy to play with as well as fresh meat to upset.

 

“Overall a successful trip.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Hands up* PLease put the pitchforks down! I Gave You A KISS! *hides behind Woojin* Please love me. Its not edited maybe I'll do it later.


	7. Who am I?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changbin is honest with Felix pt 1

The setting sun bathes them in its warm rays as they recover from what just occurred. Felix plays through everything in his head. Eating fries with Changbin. The tattoo. The stranger- Minho. Changbin losing himself.  _ The kiss. _

 

His fingers brush against his lip as he glances up at Changbin once more. It’s been about an hour since they left Woojin’s, boarding a bus in the opposite direction of where Felix lives. He watches almost wistfully as Changbin is bathed in a wave of orange light, picking up the brown colouring of his dark hair, adding a youthful look to him. 

 

With his eyes closed as he leans against the window, Felix would think he’s peaceful, even asleep. But the the tremble in his fingers,  that have stayed latched unto Felix since they sat, give away his still drumming anxiety. He thinks back to earlier, and wonders if the promise of their new destination, adds to the cause of Changbin’s tremors.

 

“ _ You should probably go home,” Changbin mutters as they step out of the shack bidding Woojin goodbye.  _

 

_ “No.” Felix stops, taking a deep breath before he continues. “I don’t know what’s going on hyung but please” - he grabs Changbin’s hand, ignoring his racing heart - “please tell me.” _

 

“ _ Later, Changbin mutters, but he refuses to be shirked off. _

 

_ “No, today- right now.”  _

 

_ Changbin meets his eye, noting the stubborn set of his jaw and steely gaze, and sighs. He’s not getting away so easily- Felix wouldn’t let him if he tried.  _

 

_ “I know a place we can go that will help explain. Truthfully,” he shrugs, “I’ve wanted to be completely honest with you for a while now.”   _

 

_ “Good,” Felix nods, “be honest with me today.”  _

 

Slipping his phone out of his pocket, Felix squints as the barrage of messages and missed calls come through. 50 are from Jimin alone.  The other 30 are varied texts and missed calls from Hyunjin and Jeongin, and two more unknown numbers. He’s screwed. 

 

“Hyung,” he whispers, turning his phone towards Changbin. “We should tell them where we are.” 

 

Silently, Changbin unlocks Felix’s phone - 12345 wasn’t the hardest of passwords, yet Felix is shocked to see him open it- and texts one of the unknown numbers. 

 

_ Headed to studio. Meet us there. -C _

 

He hands the phone back to Felix, and resumes his former position, not looking up when the phone chirps with a response. 

 

_ Fucking finally! We’ll meet you there. The preps are coming too fyi.  _

 

_ “ _ The studio?” Felix asks softly.

 

“Yea,” Changbin laces his fingers through the youngers once more. “You said to tell explain everything, so I will.” 

 

The rest of the ride is silent, both boys lost in their own thoughts and worries. The usually curious blond stayed quiet when they departed the bus in a worse off part of town, opting only to grip Changbin’s hand tighter. He wondered what the studio was, he wondered about what  _ everything  _ meant. 

 

Mostly, he wondered- worried- if his hyung was alright. Changbin wasn’t the most talkative of people, but with Felix he was different; after Minho’s appearance however, something snapped, and although he isn’t seeing red anymore, Felix can tell he isn’t fully there with him either. 

 

The studio was really just a small shed he noted when they first walked up. Felix looked around, the last of the sun’s rays leaving them in a wash of fluorescent street lighting. As Changbin slipped his key in and opened the small room, Felix wondered briefly if this was where he lived. How he lived. 

 

In the time he’s gotten to know Changbin he still felt like there were things he didn’t- couldn’t find out. Stepping inside however, Felix instantly fet as though he was transported to a place he never thought he would be so soon. 

 

Despite the dilapidated surroundings, the studio is comfortable, homely even. Moving clockwise, a large brown couch sits pressed against the wall to his right, a small kitchen sits next to the door they entered and right in front of him is a soundproofed section, built as a real recording booth. Changbin allows Felix to look around, hoping- praying, almost- that he would peice some things together. 

 

The younger soaks in the small shed, taking note of the numerous band posters on the wall by the door, the computer station that sits in front of the sectioned off booth, and the littering of CD’s, some blank and some labelled, that sit upon the computer desk. 

 

He takes one up in his hands, noting the familiar art on the cover. Flipping the case over to find a white CD- unlike the red he was used to seeing in that case- with the label written on it in plain red ink instead. 

 

_ Horizon  _

 

“I love this album,” Felix says turning to face Changbin. “How come the CD is different?” 

 

“Play it.” His stance is steady as Felix gazes at him, but he refuses to meet his eyes, giving away his insecurities.”It will help explain.” 

 

“On the computer?” The younger asks, receiving a nod and a small snort- this makes him beam, because finally, a solid reaction.

 

“We don’t exactly have another stereo system in here.” 

 

Felix takes care slipping the CD into the disk drive. When he presses play the opening cords are not what he’s used to. 

 

“Hyung-”

“This one was probably my favorite album to release.” 

 

Felix jumps as Changbin’s low voice comes from behind him, closer than before. Changbin is finally meeting his gaze, holding him captive as if willing him to figure out whatever secrets he’s holding. But Felix doesn’t understand.

 

“What?” 

 

“It was my favourite,” Changbin says softly, “Chan-hyung wasn’t really satisfied but, this one was my style.”

 

As Felix listens to the raw sounding tracks he notes the differences between this Horizon and the one he listened to religiously when Jimin first sent him a physical copy last year. The bass is stronger on this opening. The vocals haven’t been mastered yet, and the arrangement still seems a bit choppy. He’s about to ask how Changbin got a demo version of the album when a familiar voice comes from the speakers.

 

His ears perk up, attuned and attached to the voice of his favorite member. Spear B. His vocals are stronger since this version is unmastered. Felix hears every breath taken in between words, every catch as his words caress the beat. Although the words are the same, there’s something so different about this version, Felix has to really think about it instead of enjoy the music as he usually does. 

 

“You said once that SpearB was your favourite,” Changbin says, reaching around Felix to pause the track. 

 

“He is.” Felix’s voice is soft as his mind attempts to piece together what Changbin is trying to tell him.

 

“What do you think so far, Felix?” Changbin doesn’t break eye contact this time, but Felix does, if only so he can focus on his thoughts better.

 

He goes over the facts in his mind: Horizon is a 3racha album- one Changbin obviously has the demo for. Changbin is always busy after school, and never lets Felix come with him to work. Yes, he’s a music major, and he’s always writing lyrics into his small black book but surely that doesn’t mean- 

 

“I told you, I’d tell you everything.” Changbin interrupts his thoughts again. 

 

“And this is everything?” He watches as Changbin shifts again, reaching for the tattoo before he clenches his fist.

 

“No, but it’s an important part of who I am.” He steps forward. “The less painful part, anyways. Who am I, Felix?” 

 

Resuming the track, Felix listens as the entirety of the song plays out. He notes the make of the music, the lyrics being said. He knows that members write the lyrics. He knows as well, that one member produced the album. 

 

“ _ This one was probably my favorite album to release.” “Who am I, Felix?” _

 

Changbin’s words from earlier come crashing into him. He stares long and hard as Changbin glances at him, waiting for him to come to the realization of who he is. Time almost stops for both boys- hearts racing, thoughts running faster and the pounding melodies of unedited recordings playing in the background. 

 

“Hyung.” Felix starts hesitantly, half wondering if he’s crazy and thought too much into it, half wondering-- actually hoping- that this is what Changbin wanted him to find out. 

 

Neither of them hear the keys jingling in the doorway, or the chatter that follows. Neither pay attention to the album coming to an end. The whole room is brought to a stop when Felix utters is thoughts out loud, however. 

 

“You’re CB97?!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thanks to @S_cutes, for helping me figure out a direction to go from here. Slightly unedited I might add more later! Chapter 8 will be up in a few hours!


	8. The Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changbin comes clean about everything. Felix understands and I am a bit in tears for my babies. But its okay!

The room was silent for three beats. Enough time for Felix to gulp. For Hyunjin to gasp. For Changbin’s heart to drop. He can’t believe what he’s just heard. 

 

“What?” 

 

Felix scratches at his nose, watching as Changbin stares at him in disbelief. He had to admit, after he made the guess he knew he was wrong. Changbin’s voice sounded nothing like CB97s, but he panicked and CB...ChangBin it could make sense. Right?

 

“You’re CB97?” his voice lilts upwards, making his statement a question. The look on Changbin’s face was enough for him to know that saying it a second time didn’t make him correct. Still it didn’t make sense to him. 

 

Both boys stood before each other, one mortified, the other confused. Changbin wasn’t the only one confused in the room either.

 

“Actually,” a new voice interjects slowly, “that would be me.” 

 

Changbin looks away from Felix long enough to see Chan step into the small space, a hand raised sightly. He had heard the end of the album blasting as he, Jisung and Felix’s friends entered the yard; what he didn’t expect was for the boy to ask Changbin if he was CB97. The room was drowning in silence and Chan felt it was best to introduce himself before things got even more uncomfortable. 

 

“I’m Chan.”

 

Felix turned to see the boy, about his height with curly black hair, smiling at him with a very deep dimple visible.  Before he could respond an energetic burst of orange slammed into him gripping him in a tight embrace. 

 

“And I’m J.one!” The boy stepped backwards, also greeting him with a big smile. “But you can call me Jisung!”

 

Jimin rolled her eyes. “They don’t let you out very often, do they,” she snarked, breaking some of the awkward air that had built up.

 

Felix felt overwhelmed. He looked back at Changbin who now had his head in his hands and was muttering about ‘stupid fools’ to himself. If Chan was CB97 and the orange haired boy was J.one then that meant….that meant….

 

“Hyung,” Felix started weakly, thinking of all the times he had fanboyed about 3racha to Changbin. All the times he told him SpearB was his idol. He felt his face flush to the roots of his platinum hair. “Y-you’re SpearB?” 

 

His voice was soft, filled with embarrassment and a twinge of regret. Since he met Changbin, he’s always mentioned 3racha to him, mentioned SpearB was the reason he decided to pursue music, told him how much he wanted to meet him. He understood that their identities were secret, but it hurt that Changbin hid this from him. Just like he hid Minho. Chan and Jisung. He hid what his job was from him. He never talked about his family. Felix didn’t even know if he had siblings. Now Felix thought about it, Changbin knew everything about him, but he didn’t know anything about Changbin.

 

If Changbin wasn’t so close to him he would’ve missed the soft, but determined “yes.” The confirmation only made him hurt more. There were so many times, so many opportunities for him to tell him. Did he not trust that he could keep the secret? Was this why he ran from him after school?

 

“I don’t believe this.” Felix pushes off the computer table and walks over to the couch. He takes a seat, before he rises again and paces into the kitchen. The others watch as he tugs on his hair, making his eyes tear up, before he finally slumps again into the tired brown couch. 

 

“Felix-”

 

“You know,” he interjects staring at Changbin with teary eyes, “when you said you would tell me everything, I figured you would tell me how you and Minho broke up. You would tell me about your family.-”

 

“He knows about Minho?” Jisung interjects, but Felix ignores him. 

 

“I thought you would tell me that you were, I don’t know,  in a fucking gang or something.” Jimin scoffs at this, but quiets when Felix’s voice drops another octave. “I never thought you would tell me, that the man I idolize, the person who I’ve, embarrassingly might I add,  shared my dreams of meeting, the person I fanboyed over for so long, was  _ you!”  _

 

Felix tried, failingly,  to hold back tears, maybe he was overreacting but to know that the person he trusted so much couldn’t trust him hurt. All those times, did Changbin look at him and laugh silently at his ignorance? Did he come back and tell Chan and Jisung about whatever rambles Felix went on about 3racha that day?

 

Changbin’s shoulders slump as he takes in Felix’s crying image. He knew he should have hinted, or even slipped it into conversation, but he was thinking about Felix every time he didn't. He thought about, this exact thing happening. He never meant to betray Felix’s confidence in him everytime he mentioned SpearB. But how could he tell him? He never could find the right words and now...

 

“Felix, do you know how many times I wanted to tell you?” Changbin muttered, “how I agonized over what I should and shouldn’t say? Damn it Felix every single time you talk about Spear B do you know how much I’ve wanted to grab you and say that he is me!” 

 

Chan felt his heart clench seeing Changbin tear up, and Felix crying. This was something personal for them, and it felt wrong to witness it. Changbin and Felix’s eyes were locked on each other. Neither noticed as he tapped the others silently, they didn’t see him motion for them to leave, they didn’t see his concerned glance as he closed the door behind him. 

 

Silent tears streamed down Felix’s face. He knew he was being stubborn by not trying to see Changbin’s side of the story, but the embarrassment was a lot to handle for him. 

 

“Freckles,” Changbin whispers, taking a seat on the couch as well. “I wanted to tell you. I did. I just didn’t know how. Even today, at the restaurant I wanted to tell you. I’ve pictured you here, laughing with me, writing songs, napping and rapping in your sleep so many times.” 

 

“Then why didn’t you hyung? Did you not trust me?”

 

“At first,” he winces as Felix’s face falls,”but I had good reason not to. Before you nobody at JYP talked to me, nobody thought to be my friend.” He reaches out taking the younger’s hand, a sigh of relief coming from him when he doesn’t pull away. “I didn’t know if I could trust you because…”

 

“Because?” 

 

“Because I-” he takes a deep breath, willing his airway not to constrict thinking of his past. “I trusted Minho, and that was the worst mistake of my life.” 

 

The words alone were difficult, the memories even more painful. He steels himself to pull away, close himself off before he can become vulnerable again. Too many times today has Felix seen this side of him. 

 

Felix, however, is stubborn. He feels Changbin attempt to pull his hands away, and immediately tightens his grip. He won’t get away from him today. Today Felix will learn everything, just like Changbin promised. 

 

“Hyung,” he says gently, “you can tell me. You can tell me everything.”

 

“Freckles-”

 

Felix gently grasps Changbin’s face, cutting him off. Turning to face him, he slides one hand to the nape of his neck, the other on his cheek forcing him to look at him. Felix knew it then, just like he knew at the restaurant, just like he knew the day he first saw Changbin in the courtyard. This is the man he loves. The man he will love, for a very long time. If he will let him. 

 

“Trust me,” his voice is laced with determination yet remains gentle. “Please, trust me.”

 

Changbin takes a deep breath, before mirroring Felix’s position. He gently strokes the fading blonde locks at the back of his head, his thumb wiping the last remnants of tears from Felix’s pigmented cheeks. Instead of closing himself off, this time he allows the depth of Felix’s gaze to swallow him, in the most peaceful way. Lost in the feeling, he tells him everything. 

 

“He approached me first,” Changbin sighs finally, “I was new to District 9, my parents just moved into the area and had to get me into school. Not their first option but they didn’t have a choice.”

 

_ ________________4 years ago____________________ _

 

_ “Hey new kid!”  _

 

_ Changbin looked up from the map in his shaking hands, to find the source of the voice calling to him. The boy was tall, with dark hair and blue eyes. He wore a leather jacket over his uniform and even though everything about him screamed danger, Changbin was intrigued.  _

 

_ “Me?” He questioned. _

 

_ “See anyone else here?” _

 

_ Changbin looked around. He hadn’t notice the hallway clear, did the bell ring already? Was he late for class?  _

 

_ “Yea you are.” His gaze snapped back to the boy with the cat like smile. “Here, I’ll take you to your room. What class are you?”  _

 

_ “I-I’m in Section 3, G3.” _

 

_ Without another word the boy turned, looking back only once to make sure Changbin was following him. He took him down a series of corridors, all in need of a good coat of paint and cleaning. The lockers were dented, some broken or without doors, the desks were drawn on, and Changbin was positive he saw the makings of a drug deal. He sped up to walk closer to the boy then.  _

 

_ He took up up a flight of stairs and down another corridor before he slowed to a stop. Turning he looked back at Changbin, a calculating gleam, that he would later learn meant trouble for whomever it was directed at, drew Changbin in further.  _

 

_ “This is you, new kid.” _

 

_ “Changbin.” _

 

_ “What?”  _

 

_ “M-my name is C-changbin. Seo Changbin.”  _

 

_ The boy seemed amused, and Changbin wondered if he’s messed up any chance to know the mysterious boy better. Luckily, maybe not so much, the boy was just as curious about him. _

 

_ “I’m Minho,” he replied. “See you around.”  _

 

_ _______________________ _

 

“I trusted him.” Changbin said his grip tightening on Felix. “He took me under his wing, made me think I could rely on him. I told him everything Felix. I didn’t think twice about it. That was my first mistake.” 

 

______________________

 

_ The two boys were inseparable.  Everyone at D9 knew that Minho was flirty and cunning, but he had never dated nor given any indication he was interested in more than playing around. He flirted with all genders, all sexualities. Even though Changbin wasn’t used to it, he grew to like the attention Minho gave him. That’s why, after only three months, he told Minho something, he never realized he would regret.  _

 

_ They were in Changbin’s room. He had invited Minho over before, but this was the first time they were alone in the house. The boy made himself at home, sprawled on Changbin’s large bed, comic in hand, leather jacket splayed over a nearby chair. Changbin admired him. He was full of life, he was confident. He did what he wanted and nobody at District 9 could try to stop him.  _

 

_ “Binnie,” the boy said after some time, “have you ever kissed someone?”  _

 

_ “W-what?” Sure, Minho said random things all the time, but Changbin was still shocked.  _

 

_ “Have. You,” he said placing the comic down, crawling towards him. “Kissed anyone before?” _

 

_ By now he was hovering over Changbin, cat-like smile present, that same calculating gleam shining in his eyes. His contacts were purple today, and Changbin drowned in the depth of their stare.  _

 

_ “N-no?”  _

 

_ The boy smirked, and Changbin was weak. His heart was pounding, he had always known he liked boys, but this was new to him. He never could express himself to girls, and never openly said he liked boys, so he never dated. Avoided it if he could. _

 

_ But Minho, although he never said it accepted him somehow. It was like he already knew, and if he didn’t, the second Changbin’s eyes fluttered closed, his suspicions were confirmed. He smiled now, his theory was right, and his little toy was more than willing to play into his games.  _

 

_ Changbin’s lips felt cold. Minho was a hair’s width away, and he could feel him hovering. Changbin thought maybe he was undecided as well. Did he somehow make the overly confident Minho waver? He barely felt the kiss, Minho’s lips soft and just as cold as the air around them. There were no sparks, no massive fireworks, just a simple kindling of tension in his stomach. Nerves built up that overflowed.  _

 

_ When his eyes fluttered open once more, Minho was still hovering over him. His gaze seemed wilder, more playful, and Changbin saw no reason to doubt it. _

 

_ _________________________ _

 

“I thought he was excited, that maybe it was his first time kissing a boy as well.” 

 

It was Felix’s turn to wipe tears from his cheeks. His thumb brushes them away moving gently across Changbin’s skin. As if to remind him that he’s here, and that Minho could no longer hurt him. 

 

“That was my first kiss,” Changbin ignored the itch at his tattoo, opting to relish in the comfort of Felix’s silky hair. “At first he would just kiss me in private, I understood of course. District 9 was known to beat up people who were... _ other.”  _ He practically spat the word. “Then slowly, he would do other things.” 

 

“Other things?” Felix questioned gently.

 

“Yeah..” Changbin slumped, at the time the actions were filled with adrenaline, and puppy  love on his part. “He would kiss me in empty classrooms, and in the bathroom when nobody was around, but someone could come in. He would hold my hand in the hallways, and then eventually, he convinced me to show the world how much I cared about him.” 

 

_ ______________________ _

 

_ “Binnie,” Minho drawled, “get a matching tattoo with me!” _

 

_ “What?” Changbin put his pencil down. “Why do you want a tattoo?” _

 

_ “C’mon, it will be fun!” The boy beamed, making Changbin’s heart flutter. “We can get matching ones, to show everyone that we don’t care what they think. A couple’s tattoo!”  _

 

_ “Hyung,” Changbin started, “I don’t know if that’s a good idea. I mean what if-”  _

 

_ “No what if’s come on Binnie.” Minho blinked jutting out his bottom lip, “don’t you think you’ll love me forever? That we’ll last that long? Is that why you don’t want to get the tattoo?” _

 

_ “Hyung that’s not what I-” _

 

_ “I get it,” the older pulled away, turning to hide his cunning smile, “you think you’re better than me, you can do better right? Who would love the poor kid from District 9 anyways.”  _

 

_ Changbin was shocked. That’s not what he meant. He never flaunted his wealth on Minho or anyone. Had he? Sure, he bought the meals at lunch, and never thought twice when Minho asked for anything. But a tattoo was permanent.  _

 

_ “Hyung,” Changbin stood, turning the boy to face him. “That’s not it, you know that. I don’t care about that stuff I care about you. How about this, we can go this weekend to the tattoo shop on Main. And after we can go to Woojin-hyung’s restaurant okay?”  _

 

_ Minho pulled him into a hug, sniffling into his shoulder. He didn’t see the gleam in his eyes that screamed victory, nor did he feel the giggles that left Minho’s lips. Changbin continued to hold him, rubbing his back, wondering how he would hide the small admission of adoration from his parents.  _

 

_ \--------------- _

 

_ “You promise you’ll get yours tomorrow right?” Changbin asked earnestly as he filled out the forms. He wasn’t squeamish with needles, but a tattoo was permanent he had to be sure. _

 

_ “Of course,” said the teasing voice on the other side of the line.  Changbin believed him. Changbin always believed him. _

 

_ He loved him. _

 

_ “A promise of friendship, love and affection,” Changbin whispered as he left the parlour. _

 

_ He was excited to show him tomorrow. To watch him get his matching tattoo. But that never happened. _

 

_ He trusted him.  _

 

_ “H-hyung..” Changbin’s voice came out broken, raw and laced with betrayal. “I don’t-” _

 

_ “What?” The boy sneered, his eyes wild and cunning. “You thought I would get a matching tattoo? With you? It was a bet shortcakes. Speaking of which all of you pay up!” _

 

_ Changbin watched in horror as the snickering group handed forward various bills, all of which the boy he loved stuffed in his pockets.  He was hurt, he was betrayed and he was angry. He turned to leave when the voice he grew to love called out to him. _

 

_ He was betrayed by Him.  _

 

_ “Did you think we would let you go so easily?” _

 

_ Changbin fought back. Hard. But there was more of them than there was of him. Even as his face got scratched, his fingers torn and bloody, it was his tattoo that burned hotter than anything else. _

 

_ He was Hurt by Him.  _

 

_ __________________________________ _

 

They sat there for a long time, after Changbin stopped talking. Felix held him while he cried. He cried with him, for what he went through. For not being there to help him. 

 

“Hyung,” he choked after sometime, pulling back to look Changbin in the eye. “I’m so sorry you had to go through that. But I’m here now. And I will make sure he can never hurt you again.” 

 

Changbin didn’t know what to say, so he simply pulled his sunshine back into his arms. He sincerely hoped that Felix would never have to make good on the promise he made at the restaurant. He hoped he never had to fight for Changbin ever. But he saw Minho’s gaze when he left them earlier. He saw the promise to return. He saw the truth behind the snake like eyes he one loved. 

 

Tightening his hold on Felix, Changin made a secret vow to himself then. He would do everything in his power to stop his past from hurting his future. He would protect Felix from Minho, even if that meant protecting him with his life. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY BISHES SO HE'RES AN EARLY UPDATE!!!! ENJOY!


	9. Broken Spirits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Changbin still feels uneasy since seeing Minho, the boys are all tired and hungry.

The showcase was fast approaching, and Changbin felt overwhelmed. Minho hadn’t shown up since the spat at Woojin’s, but some instinctual part of him was always on high alert, waiting for the other shoe to drop. His only relief were the mornings spent with Felix and his friends (now his friends, but none of them really put labels on the amicable trust built) and his evenings spent preparing in the studio. After the big reveal of his past and identity, it was actually Felix, who declined joining him in the studio that following Wednesday.

 

Most of the school was used to seeing them together, so their closeness was not as much of a scandal. However, their tightly gripped hands did cause some floating whispers to brush past them. Not that they cared.

 

“Hyung it’s okay really.” The blonde released a laugh at the pout he was given. “You need to focus on preparing, the showcase is in three days. Besides, I want to be surprised.”

 

“Okay,” Changbin muttered. He felt a bit defeated that Felix refused coming with him, for the third day in a row. “I’ll see you tomorrow then.”

 

“Yes, you’ll see me tomorrow.”

 

“And you’ll text me when you're home.”

 

“Yes hyung,” Felix rolled his eyes, pushing his boyfriend towards the bus stop. “Go you’ll miss your bus.”

 

“I love you,” Changbin said softly. His grip tightened, his lips quirking at how Felix’s eyes widened.

 

Felix felt his heart melting, and was almost tempted to go with him. But he would be firm about this, if Changbin knew that all it took was a pout and ‘i love you’  to make Felix would break on everything, he’s always use it to his advantage.

 

“I love you too,” he said, “now go!”

 

___

 

“Again, again, again!”

 

They were all tired and if he was being honest, his rapping wasn’t where it needed to be, but if Chan yelled ‘again’ one more time, someone was going to die. And if definitely wouldn’t be him.

 

“Hyung, we’ve been at it for five hours, maybe we can take more than a ten minute break. Maybe order some take out?”

 

Jisung was beyond exhausted, but he knew the look on Changbin hyung’s face promised murder if they didn’t rest soon. Besides he was starving.

 

“Yeah, whatever.” Chan threw over his shoulder tiredly. “Let’s take an hour, I think we all need it.”

 

At his words Jisung completely deflates unto the couch, opening the Uber-eats app on his phone, while Changbin downs the rest of his water greedily.

 

Staring at his phone, Changbin reads over the texts he’s missed. He smiles when he sees Felix texted that he's home, before proceeding to send a stream of memes. His smile grows as he reads each one. Most of them were stupid, all of them another insight to Felix's humour. He loved it. A pillow flies and hits his head causing a disgruntled mumble to leave his lips. In response to Jisung's whipping noises, he simply flips him off, too enamoured to care. Another round of notifications stop him from replying. 

**Da Gang Squad (Jisung is stupid) [7]**

Since they met, Jisung created a group chat with Felix’s friends, and even though Changbin never spoke in the group save a couple comments here and there, it was funny seeing the way they all bantered over various topics. Currently Hyunjin and Felix were debating the logistics of whether humanity could withstand having two moons.

 

 **Freckles:** M8 nothing would be wrong, we would just see the moon during the day as well is all

 

 **Scared one:** No genius, the moon controls tides and shit so like two moons is double tides, and we’d have constant sunamis and all that

 

 **Braces:** tsunamis*

 

 **Scared one:** either you contribute or leave.

 

 **Braces:** ^^

 

 **Freckles:** Hey don’t be mean to him. its not his fault you can’t spell tsunami

 

 **Scared one:** ANYWAYS, my point is we’d all fucking die okay?

 

 **_Freckles_ ** _is typing..._

 

“What do you think hyung,” Jisung says.

 

“About what?”

 

“Do you think humanity could survive two moons?”

 

Changbin shrugs, watching as his boyfriend and his friends continue their argument. Most times he tended to ignore their rambling, but he had to admit they got him to think.

 

“I mean, Felix is right, we’d see the moon during the day, but it would depend where they are right?” He pauses thinking about where his point is going before continuing. “If they’re next to each other, then Hyunjin is right, we have a problem with gravity, but if they’re on either side of the Earth, then maybe we’d find a way to live around it. Just depends on their position.”

 

Jisung ponders on his statement. Nodding slowly, he opens his mouth to answer when a thunder-like explosion is heard from outside. Instantly both boys jump to their feet, searching for the cause of the noise, fatigue and lunar physics ignored.

 

“Chan hyung!”

 

Running towards the main house, Changbin makes out the blurry outline of a bike riding away, but ignores it in favor of getting to his friend. Inside he finds Jisung kneeling on the ground in front of the front door, Chan unconscious in his hands, their dinner scattered on the doorstep and blood pooling around his midsection.

 

“Hyung! Hyung!” Jisung screams frantically, looking up at Changbin. “Call the police!”

 

Already dialing Changbin watches as Jisung takes his own shirt off to press to their leader’s wound. He tries hard to ignore the younger boys’s screams as he gives the address to the dispatcher, fighting his own choked sobs as well.

 

When the police arrive, everything starts to feel like a dream to him. He explains their decision for a break, ordering dinner, the sound he and Jisung heard, the biker he saw riding away - no license plate number seen. He explains that they used Ubereats, but that even then, the name that came up wasn’t someone they knew.

 

Jisung had insisted on going with Chan in the ambulance, Changbin agreeing to come after his questioning was finished.  He watches as they cord off the entrance to the house, outlining where Chan was lying when he found him, taking numerous pictures of the spilt food, the blood, the bullet. They tape the area off as if he’s dead and Changbin has to look away- _no, Changbin he’s not dead,_ he forces himself to think _._

 

 _“_ Son?” the police asks, snapping him out of his thoughts, “I know this is difficult, but do you think there’s any possible suspects to consider? Anyone who might want your friend dead or hurt?”

 

One particular person comes to mind, but he wouldn’t -couldn’t- believe that Minho could be that ruthless. Or that he would even want the chance to harm Chan, to the point of shooting him. And so with a heavy heart, and a dry throat, Changbin croaked out a solemn, “No sir.”

 

______

 

He’d always hated hospitals. Anything to do with doctors really, Changbin couldn’t stand it. The last time he was in a hospital was when his grandfather died. Now though, he would tough it out for another important person.

 

“Doc said it narrowly missed his intestines, and he’s lucky it went straight through.” Jisung informed him when he finally managed to leave the house. The police said Jisung would have to come down to the station the day after, and neither of them, nor anyone else would be allowed on the premise. That meant they no longer had a studio to practice in, not that either of them could think about that now.

 

“He say when he’d wake up?” Changbin asked, watching as their best friend slept way too still for his liking.

 

“Nope, just said they would ‘watch him through the night and look for changes.’” Changbin watched as the usually upbeat kid, slid solemnly into an uncomfortable green chair, head leaning against the wall, eyes shut tightly. He thought about what he told the police earlier; about there being nobody he suspected.

 

“Jisung,” he started, taking a seat next to him.

 

“Hmm?”

 

“You don’t think-” he cut himself off, doubt and disbelief stopping his thoughts.

 

The boy propped an eye open lazily. “That Minho had something to do with this?”

 

Changbin turned to him in shock, silently confirming Jisung’s question. Although the boy was often loud and obnoxious, he was incredibly perceptive and more intelligent than he let on.

 

“Yea,” he muttered, as Jisung simply closed his eyes again.

 

“Bet your ass I do. I just have no way to prove it and we can’t go telling the police that, when Minho never had any actual beef with Chan-hyung. They’d say it was just speculation, and knowing that cunning, weasel shaped bitch, he probably has a solid alibi.”

 

He considered the younger boy’s words and found he felt exactly the same. Even though he had no proof Minho was there, he knew that he definitely had something to do with it. Still, there were too many variables; the unknown delivery person, Minho’s whereabouts, it was all too much. Sighing, he allows his body to relax in the plastic chair, drifting into a fitful sleep.

_________

 

“Hyung, wake up.”

 

Changbin stirs in the chair, his neck protesting against his movements. His body feels cramped and sweaty, despite his clean surroundings, he feels gross.

 

“Hyung, Chan hyung woke up.” Jisung says, “wake up.”

 

He sits up properly at that, his spine cracking as it re-aligns itself. Joining Jisung by the window, he peers into the room to see Chan talking to the doctor. Silently, they watch as the nurses check his charts, and the doctor explains what happened. After a few moments, they’re waved in by one of the nurses.

 

“Hyung!” Jisung exclaims, set to hug Chan when Changbin yanks him back by his collar.

 

“He just got shot, Jisung, don’t touch him.”

 

“Oh,” the younger replies, “sorry.”

 

“It’s alright,” Doctor Cha says, “you can hug him, just be gentle.”

 

He allows the boys to get acquainted, mindful of how the two slept just outside the room last night. Finally, he clears his throat bringing their attention to him.

 

“Now Chan, even though the bullet went straight through, it did significant muscle damage. I’ve stitched you up best as I can, but you’ll be on bed rest for a while.”

 

“A while as in a few days?” Jisung asks.

 

“As in a few weeks, maybe even as little as a month.”

 

“Is it possible for me to leave and return?” Chan asks, even though he knows the answer already.

“Absolutely not,” the doctor replies. “I doubt you’ll even be able to move, without being in pain for a few days.”

 

The trio nod, Jisung and Changbin bowing as the doctor turns and leaves. With a soft grunt, Chan sinks into the bed, mind reeling at what’s happened. Changbin looks at him unsure of what to say, when Jisung breaks the silence.

 

“Hyung,” he starts slowly,” if you can’t leave the hospital until you’re healed, what do we do for the showcase?”

 

They were all thinking it, but none of them knew the answer. Revealing the situation wasn’t an option, their hidden identities were paramount to their success. Forfeighting wasn’t desirable either, but the way Changbin saw it, that was the only option they had. Without saying, the realization hits all three at the same time, and with solemn nods, they silently agree.

 

They would miss the showcase this year.  

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not really happy about this chapter so I might end up editing the crap out of it at some point. See ya next week! x.x


	10. My Boyfriend is Missing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix doesn't know where his boyfriend is, someone help this kid.

Felix was going to go crazy. If he heard the words, Changbin, gunfight and gang war in the same sentence one more time, he was gonna throttle the person who said it. 

 

"Dude," Hyunjin claps a hand on his shoulder, "I'm sure it's just talk, he's fine." 

 

"Oh yea? Then why hasn't he answered my calls  _dude,_ why hasn't he texted me back!" 

 

A rough hand cards through his hair as he blows out another heated sigh. The showcase is tomorrow, and Changbin's been missing for as far as Felix has counted 14 hours, 23 minutes and 12, 13, 14 seconds. He was going nuts. The first tresses of the rumours hit him on the bus this morning. Some girl with pink hair eyed him, while she not-so-silently told her friend she thought he was the one dating the gangbanger from JYP. Since then it's been a mess of pointed stares and pitying looks. Felix didn't understand it. Just what happened when he sent him off yesterday. 

 

"You're over thinking Felix," Hyunjin sighed. "You've never paid attention to rumours and suddenly they've got you all tied up?" 

 

"You know about Minho," Felix's eyes widened, "what if he has something to do with this! I should've gone with him yesterday. Did you know he asked me to come? he pouted Hyunjin! He pouted and I still said no, I let him go and now I'me hearing all over the place hes getting shot and what it-"

 

Hyunjin watched the boy he considered his best friend slowly think himself into a fading mess. He had to admit, he never thought he himself would worry about Changbin of all people. Seven months ago the mere mention of Changbin sent fear shooting down his bones Now, however, he knew just how special the dark rapper was, and how much he cared about his friend. 

 

"I'll help you find him," he says catching Felix's slightly panicked gaze, halting his rambles. "As soon as last period ends we'll go Changbin-hunting. But you've gotta try and make it through the day without a breakdown. Okay?" 

 

Felix considers, before deflating. "O-okay, we'll find him" 

 

"Yes we will"

 

"And he'll be okay..."

 

"Yes Felix." 

 

'And-"

 

Hyunjin took a peice of meat and shoved it in his mouth. "More eat, less panic." 

_____  
  


The plan was simple enough. Hyunjin and Felix would check the music store on the east end, Jimin and Jeongin would check the arcade and bistro by the river. If they didn't find them and still no answers Woojin agreed they could all come and stay by the diner. They would keep each other updated in the group chat just incase one of the trio checked, so they would know where to go. 

 

It shouldve gone smoothly, in Hyunjin's head it did. He missed one calculation however. Felix and his surprising bouts of anxiety. 

 

"Felix, we haven't even gotten to the music store yet, you have to calm down." 

 

"But what if we get there and they say he was in there just before Minho showed up and-" 

 

"Dude!" Hyunjin grabs Felix by the shoulders, "Here's the plan, are you listening?"

 

"yea.."

 

"We're gonna go to The Zone, check around if they're there, if not, we go along to the record shop, if they're still not there then we meet Jeongin and Jimin noona at Woojin hyungs and we wait. Along the way there will be no car chases, no gun fighting and no Minho."

 

He watches as Felix takes a deep breath and nods slowly. He didn't know why, but just the thought of Changbin in danger at all made him lose all rationale. Maybe it was because of what happened the last time he saw Minho, but that over protective instinct that grew then never went away, and although he was younger he felt the need to shield Changbin. To protect him from ever having to hurt again. With him missing like this though, that was kind of difficult.

 

Still, he tried, if only for Hyunjin's sanity to keep calm. Nothing would happen and they would be just fine. 

____

He was wrong.

 

Dear God he was so very wrong. 

 

The Zone was a hotspot, a rare one though, for people, well...like 3racha. Felix could see the appeal the place had. Despite the peeling paint, strange scent of dust and parchment and slightly questionable customer base, it seemed like a chill spot. Hyunjin's old fears returned however - just because he wasn't scared of Changbin, Jisung or Chan didn't mean he wasn't scared of actual gang members - making him stride a little closer to Felix. 

 

"Excuse me," Felix started walking up to the tattooed woman holding a box.

 

Hyunjin looked around for a few minutes, avoiding eye contact with the group of boys towards the back walking straight to the register. 

 

"E-excuse me," he started softly, catching the attendants attention. "H-has this guy been in here today?" He holds up the picture of Changbin, Felix shared to the group.

The attendant blew their gum into a large bubble making Hyunjin jump at the loud pop, before they stood and looked at him closely.

 

"Who's asking?" 

 

"Uhm..."

 

"I'm asking." Felix stepped forward, allowing Hyunjin to slink behind him. 

 

The attendant smirked at Hyunjin's obvious fear before eyeing Felix. 

 

"And who are you to be asking?"

 

"His boyfriend." Felix watched the attendant eye him sharply, and for a minute wondered if they knew what happened to Changbin before. 

 

"Well,  _boyfriend,_ I can't say I've seen him," Felix visibly deflated, " -but, I can say that you're the second  _boyfriend_ to come in looking for him. So I'll ask again, who are you to be asking for him." 

Felix and Hyunjin both rushed forward questions firing at the same time. 

 

"What do you mean second boyfriend?"

 

"Who the fuck was in here looking for my man?"

 

"Where did he go?"

 

The attendant raised their hands, shocked at the response. "Jesus, I dont know some dark haired guy with green eyes and a jean jacket with D9 stitched in red. He came in saying he was looking for his boyfriend and was wondering if he was in here. He also said if someone else came in looking for him not to tell them anything."

 

Felix slapped the counter, catching the attention of the boys at the back of the store.

 

"That asshole. Why is he looking for him too?" 

 

"Felix.."

 

"Why can't he just leave him alone?"

 

"Felix..."

 

"I swear the next time I see that can shaped bitch I'm gonna-"

 

"Feli-"

 

"What will you do  _Felix?"_

 

 

At the sound of his voice Felix turns and faces his boyfriends only nightmare. His smirk is prominent, eyes flashing with amusement. Felix clenches his fist at the sight of him. 

 

"Minho."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SO SORRY FOR BEING SUCH A HEATHENOUS BITCH AND TAKING THIS LONG. BUT I SWEAR I'LL TRY AND WRITE MORE. It helps when you guys give me your support somehow! (tumblr: @hwarang-my-loves come drop me a message!)


	11. An Answer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The can shaped bitch is back, and Felix is probably gonna might kinda want to punch him. We'll see. Also where the fuck is Changbin?

Previously on Sunshine Rapper: 

_At the sound of his voice Felix turns and faces his boyfriends only nightmare. His smirk is prominent, eyes flashing with amusement. Felix clenches his fist at the sight of him._

_"Minho."_

____________

 

He's going to kill him. Yes. Killing him seemed like a great plan. He could throttle him go for his eyes first. 

 

The boy before him chuckled at his expression. "Did, did you just call me a can-shaped bitch?"  _No_ , Felix thinks,  _I can go for that god awful smirk. Yea, knocking his teeth out seem like a wonderful idea._

 

Felix raised his head, jaw taught. "I did, and what about it?"

Hyunjin seemingly chokes at Felix's statement. Felix himself doesn't know when he got that bold but hes furious, and still thinking how exactly to take the bitch out.

 

"Why are you looking for Changbin hyung?" He takes a step closer to Minho, who's smirk blooms into a full blown smile. He's crazy and dangerous, Felix only hopes he finds Changbin before Minho does.

 

He shrugs carelessly. Felix watches Minho as he tries to control his smile, looking at his rings as if he had no cares at all. " Well I heard a little rumour and just wanted to see if it was true." Pushing off the counter he walks closer, towering just slightly over the blonde. "I just want to make sure he's okay."

 

"W-what rumours?" Hyunjin piped up. Felix's eye brow jumps, and Minho's smirk returns. Felix hates his face.

 

"Oh you know, that someone went to their studio and shot one of the trio...just checking if the...right person was hit." 

 

Hes heard enough.

 

"You peice of shit!" He lunges, only for Hyunjin to hold him back. If Changbin got shot and Minho was behind it he'd make sure he never saw day again. He decides it doesn't matter which part he goes for first, as long as the stupid fucker stops breathing by his hands."Where is he?! Did you order one of your side bitches to hurt him! Let go off me!" 

 

"Oh no.." Minho sighed wistfully, watching the boy struggle in amusement " _I_ would  _never_ do such a thing, what power could I hold at all to get our poor little Binnie shot. He is my boyfriend after all." 

 

Felix lunges again, pulling against Hyunjin's surprisingly strong grip on him. He wants to rip his hair out, he remembers Changbins tears, the pain behind the art on his wrist. If Changbin is hurt- Minho laughs at his response urging him to punch him even more.  

"Oh I love a good love triangle don't you?" he says, "Anyways I have a round of clinics and holes in the ground to search for the love of my- i mean _our_ lives, see you around  _Freckles_." 

Minho blows him a kiss before brushing past him, narrowly missing Felix's foot aimed at his balls. Tsking at his actions, Minho giggles as he leaves, his friends in matching d9 jackets not far behind. Once the door shut Hyunjin finally lets go. Felix could only imagine how that group of boys tormented Changbin in the past. They were the ones who made bets on his innocence and laughed when he got hurt. They were the ones that hurt him. Felix was angry. No. He was beyond that. He was fuming, raging, vehement. He wanted blood. 

"Ugh that motherfucker! I can't fucking stand him! He just shows up on literally what feels like the worst fucking day and acts like such a big-" 

"Fuck?" the attendant cuts in. 

Felix shoots him a scathing glare.

"Why didn't you say he was still here?" Hyunjin acts a little less scared of the guy than before. 

"You didn't ask about that, you asked who he was where he went all that.." 

"Still!" Felix bursts. "Clearly you know who he is and you knew about Changbin hyung too!" 

 "Yea I knew Binnie," the attendant pops their gum again, " Such a shame really. He was so in love got a tattoo and-"  

They never finished speaking.

 

__________________

The two boys stand outside, Felix cradling his hand and Hyunjin staring at him shellshocked. They walk side by side towards the bus stop, taking in the last few minutes. Hyunjin chuckles as they stop by the sign. 

"You didn't have to punch him." he says lightly.

"I had to punch something and his face was there."  

Another silent chuckle leaves him before he takes out his phone and informing Jeongin and Jimin what happened. After seeing their negative luck the group decided to meet at Woojins early. 

Hyunjin keeps a close eye on Felix on the bus ride there, as he leans against the window, cradling his hand softly. He discreetly texts Woojin telling him to have an ice pack ready for Felix's hand. In the past few months he's seen all kinds of things because of this kid, and now he cant imagine being without him. He wonders briefly if that's how Felix feels about Changbin, obviously  more ...lovey? but still, that loyalty, Hyunjin understands it now. When they ring the stop to come off, Hyunjin watches his friend shoulders slumped, platinum bangs covering his eyes and vows then that he'll stand up for him even more now- he'll stay by his side, he'll encourage him to be the best he can be-just like Felix has for him. 

Woojin had an ice pack ready for Felix when he came in, and promptly bandaged his hand, ignoring Felix's protests and scathing glares at Hyunjin. The diner is the same as Felix remembers, laminated menus, red lights the one big light up middle finger on the wall, and Woojin's kind smiles. If he weren't so riled up he'd feel at home here. Still, its nearing over 18 hours since he last spoke to Changbin, and if that fucked up bitch was right, Chan and Jisung were also potentially in danger.

 

"So what now?" Woojin says, letting go Felix's hand. They all look lost at that statement. Jeongin slumps against Hyunhin in the corner off the booth while Jimin shrugs, curious as to when she grew so attached to this band of misfits. 

 "Hyung is there anywhere they would've gone if he did in fact get hurt?"

Everyone looks at Felix, who doesn't look at them but picks at the corner of the menu before him. His shoulders are slumped even more than before, freckles darkened with the thrumming heat in his cheeks, whether from anger or holding back tears, the others cant decide.

 "Felix..." Hyunjin says softly, "You don't believe Minho do you?" 

 "Of course not," he replies unconvincingly. A tense moment passes before he speaks again.  "There's just, something about the way he said it doesn't sit right with me. Like he _knew_ one of them actually got hurt." 

"Well," Woojin cuts in, "If they did get hurt, usually they came to me. It was never more serious than a couple of bruises and cuts that could be cleaned and bandaged." 

The group deflates at hitting another dead end. 

"Well," Jimin breaks the silence, "I guess we wait." 

 _________

 

Jisung was gonna pull his hair clear out of his scalp if the officer asked him this one more time. 

 

"Listen carefully," he says slowly, ignoring the officer's disapproving look, "we ordered food, why? because we're hungry kids with just enough money to get fried chicken and sodas with a side of seasoned fries. Why aren't you checking for who shot my hyung? Where the uber eats guy went, I gave you my phone you should be looking into the shooter not how many shits I took in the last 18 hours!"

His eyes are wide, hands firmly planted in his hair. He's exhausted if he's being honest, between Chans surgery, sleeping on that god awful plastic chair and now being seated here and asked stupid questions, Jisung's just about had it. When they told him and Changbin they had to come to the police station, and that they had to give up their phones, Jisung was okay with that. He knew they were just doing their jobs, in fact he was glad they got paid any attention at all, but this man asked him the same thing five times in a row and none of it had anything to do with who shot his hyung. 

The officer hisses at his cursing, before finally writing Jisung's statement. 

"So," he starts, " You're saying you have no idea who could've done this, why or with what motive? No suspects? Nothing?" 

Jisung slumps into the plastic chair. "No! Channie-hyung isn't the type to have enemies, he gets scared at thunder and cries watching Zootopia, does that sound like a man with enemies?"

In the booth across the room Changbin utters a similar response. 

"I already told the officer yesterday, I don't know who shot him." 

"Yes, but you kids, especially you, as I see here have had your fair share of disturbances." The officer raises an eyebrow, clearly drawing a bias. Changbin's scowl deepens. What was the point of saying anything, they clearly believed that they were just a bunch of gang-related kids wasting their lives. 

"What are you trying to say? I already told you everything. We took a break from practicing, we ordered with uber eats, then Channie hyung got shot and we called the police. We didn't see the licence plate, or the face of who it was. And if you aren't charging us with anything then I'd say we're done here." 

After signing their statements and collecting their phones, he grabs Jisung- effectively ending his rant about the necessity of public service cops - and drags him outside. 

 "God that man is the reason why I should be a lawyer, take down all the stupid ones who think they can hold you accountable. He didn't even ask me about the shooter!" Jisung pulled on his hair again. "If I wasn't such a talented son of an angel I'd honstly sell my soul and go to law school-"

Changbin nodded along to Jisungs rambles as he checks his phone. 17 missed calls and 45 texts from Felix, 10 missed calls and 30 texts from Jimin and over a thousand messages to the group chat. He never considered in all the madness to update them about what happened. It had been him, Jisung and Chan for so long, that reading the worried messages and conversations of where to go to look for them made him a bit emotional. They cared. 

 

"Hyung are you even listening to me?" Jisung turns to see Changbin stopped a few paces behind, seemingly tearing up at his phone. "Jeez," he starts slowly, " I know my rant was passionate but I din't think you would cry hyung." 

 Changbin looks up before pointing at his phone. Maybe it was the lack of sleep, maybe it was the events of yesterday night and this morning finally catching up to him. Changbin isn't sure but what he does know is that his boyfriend is looking for him, waiting for him, and he needs to see him. Now. He stares at the string of texts in his and Felix's private chat. 

**_Freckles:_ ** _Hyung you'll never guess the bs I just heard on the bus, ^^ I'll tell you in a few, walking to the courtyard now x_

**_Freckles:_ ** _Oh my god Hyung are you actually late???_

_**_Freckles:_** Did you sleep over at CHannie hyungs?_

_**_Freckles:_ ** _Hyung why are more people saying you got shot?_ _

__**_Freckles:_ ** _Hyung......heloooooooooooo_ _ _

___**_Freckles:_ ** _CHANGBINN_ _ _ _

____**_Freckles:_ ** _MY LOVE WAKE UPPPPPP_ _ _ _ _

_____**_Freckles:_ ** _Seriously its lunch and you're still not here?? Dude wtf_ _ _ _ _ _

______**_Freckles:_ ** _Hyung the literal 17th person for today has said "omg thats the one who's bf got shot" wtf is going on where are you?_ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______**_Freckles:_ ** _I'm really worried hyung are you sick?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________**_Freckles:_ ** _I'm coming to find you_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________**_Freckles:_ ** _Are you still at the studio? Jisung and Channie hyung aren't answering either_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________**_Freckles:_ ** _So Woojin hyung doesnt know where you are, I'm convinced you're just sleeping. Right?_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________**_Freckles:_ ** _Idk if you saw in the chat but me and Hyunjin are headed to the Zone lmk and if ur not there we're going to Woojin hyungs_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________**_Freckles:_ ** _Jeongin and Jimin noona said there's police at the studio!! Hyung what the fuck answer me!!_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________**_Freckles:_ ** _i swear to god hyung you better be okay_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________**_Freckles:_ ** _I just saw Minho, punched the fuck out of him......ok I punched the fuck out of the counter attendant but god I wish it was Minho_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________**_Freckles:_ ** _He said the same thing....about you being shot, Hyung please answer me. The others are worried but I'm fucking terrified please come to Woojin hyungs soon. I need to see you._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________**_Freckles:_ ** _I need to hold you in my arms Changbin, I'm not moving until you're here. I'll stay here all night._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_______________**_Freckles:_ ** _I love you, please, please please please please fuckign be safe. I love you._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

 

Changbin tries to hide his tears from Jisung, who's looking at him strangely. "They're waiting for us at Woojin-hyungs restaurant." He takes a breath, but God he didn't think about this. He shouldv'e called him as soon as it happened, he should've told him he wouldn't be at school. He was so wrapped up in everything, he actually forgot -

 "Who?" Jisung breaks his train of thought

"Felix."

Felix was his sunshine, how could he be such a bad boyfriend that he forgot to tell him.  

Changbin decided then, that he would never deserve Felix.

He watches as Jisung checks his own phone reading through the message thread. The streams of 'answer us' and 'yo dude wtf there's police at the studio' sends him into a panic. They both read Hyunjin's panicked responses of Minho's appearance and that they're headed to Woojins. Jisung never fully realized what it would feel like to have more than just Changbin and Chan in his life, and now with these new friends, he's not sure he deserves them-but he'll work everyday until he feels like he does.

_______

 The room was way too cold for how he felt. They'd been waiting for more than four hours and every second that goes by Felix feels his nerves plucking. He replays Jimin's story of what the studio looked like when they got there. 

_"There was a pool of blood by the door, and police tape everywhere, they wouldn't even let us in the front gate or tell us who got shot." Her lips set into an indignant pout, "the bastards even had the nerve to joke that it was a gang fight can you believe that?"_

He lays his head against the table, rubbing his head back and forth on the cool surface. Everything was beginning to irritate him. Jeongin tapping on the table with his fingers. Jimin typing on her phone. Even Woojin's steady presence in the doorway annoyed him, unmoving but there-it drove him nuts. 

He raises his head, eyes glued to his phone. The device lay silent, screen dark. He looks up at the shotty wooden door that also stays unmoving. He sighs and repeated his actions. 

 He never stopped to think that just as he was on edge everyone else was too, and his actions annoyed them as well.

"Felix, staring between the door and the phone every five seconds won't make him call or show up here any faster." Jimin finally snapped. She had probably messaged Chan 20 times, Jisung at least 10 and Changbin probably more than 30. Updating them all on the same things, where they were, how she wouldn't forgive any of them if they didn't answer her messages and how she wasn't a woman to be ignored. 

No luck.  

She knew how on edge Felix was, but his annoyance was rubbing off on the rest of them and she was getting ready to snap. She's not sure when she grew to care for Changbin and his friends, but after seeing the studio, and the thread of worried messages she herself has sent, she's just as much invested in finding them as he is. She watches Felix roll his eyes at her before he resumes his steady rhythm and has to bite her tongue. Phone. Door. Sigh. Phone. Door. Sigh.

Just as she goes to tell him off, every phone in the room chimed. 

 Felix grabbed it like a life line. Opening the message he read it, then re-read it again. It was Jisung in the group chat. 

 

**Chipmunk cheeks:** _Hangang Hospital, 4th floor room 4419. We'll explain everything._

  

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its 1AM and I'm literally writing these chapters in the AO3 box thingy, somehow it still looks incredibly short....anyways leave a comment lmk what you think all that.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone this is my first series I hope you love it! updates should be every Thursday. Let me know what you think on tumblr @hwarang-my-loves :)


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